What do chickens call school tests?
Eggs-aminations.
Why does a chicken coop have two doors?
Because if had four doors it would be a chicken sedan.
What kind of tree does a chicken come from?
A poul-tree.
What do you call a chicken that crosses the road?
Poultry in motion.
What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?
A brick layer.
What happens when a hen eats gunpowder?
She lays hand gren-eggs.
What do you get when you cross a chicken with a Martian?
An eggs-traterrestrial.
How do you know if it's too hot in the chicken barn?
The chickens are laying hard-boiled eggs.
Why is it easy for chicks to talk?
Because talk is cheep.
What does a chicken need to lay an egg every day?
Hen-durance.
Why did the chicken join a band?
Because it already had drumsticks.
Did you hear about the chicken who could only lay eggs in the winter?
She was no spring chicken.
What do you get when you cross a chicken and a four-leaf clover?
The Cluck o’the Irish!
I have no idea how to raise chickens.
I think I’ll just wing it.
What do chickens serve at birthday parties?
Coop-cakes.
I ate an omelette for breakfast…
but I’m still feeling peckish.
Why did the chicken go to KFC?
He wanted to see a chicken strip.
What kind tree grows chickens?
Poultry.
Why did the chicken stop in the middle of the road?
Because it wanted to lay it on the line.
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
He wanted to get to the other slide.
What do chickens study in school?
Eggonomics.
Why can’t a rooster ever get rich?
Because he works for chicken feed.
What do you get when a chicken lays an egg on top of a barn?
An eggroll.
What do you call the door to a chicken barn?
The hen-trance.
How did the headless chicken cross the road?
In a KFC bucket.
Which chicken is at the top of the pecking order?
Attila the Hen.
What do you get if you feed gunpowder to a chicken?
An egg-splosion.
What do you get if you cross a chicken with an alarm?
An alarm cluck.
What do chicken families do on Saturday afternoon?
They go on peck-nics.
How do baby chickens dance?
Chick-to-chick.
What do chickens grow on?
Eggplants.
Why did the rooster cross the road?
He heard there were some hot chicks on the other side.
The chicken farmer died under mysterious circumstances.
The police suspect fowl play.
What do you call a chicken that crosses the road, rolls in the dirt, crosses the road again, and then rolls in the dirt again?
A dirty double-crossing chicken.
What do chickens grow on?
Eggplants.
Which dance will a chicken not do?
The foxtrot.
How do you know if it’s too hot in the chicken barn?
The chickens are laying hard-cooked eggs.
What did the baby chicken say when he saw his mother sitting on an orange?
Dad, look what marma-laid!
Why did the T-Rex cross the road?
Because the chicken hadn’t evolved yet.
When the farmer died, all his chickens were sold to the highest bidder.
They would have preferred to stay on the farm, but auctions speak louder than birds.
Is chicken soup good for your health?
Not if you’re the chicken.
Why don’t chickens wear pants?
Their peckers are on their face.
How does a chicken mail a letter to her friend?
In a HEN-velope!
I don't agree with battery hens.
Surely they'd lay bigger eggs if they were plugged into the mains.
What do you get when you cross a chicken with a bell?
An alarm cluck.
How do baby chickens dance?
Chick-to-chick.
What did one chicken say to the other after they walked through poison ivy?
“You scratch my beak and I’ll scratch yours!”
Why do chickens lay eggs?
Because if they dropped them, they’d break.
What do you call a group of chickens clucking in unison?
A Hensemble.
What happened to the baby chicken that misbehaved at school?
It was egg-spelled.