What did the lion say to his cubs when he was first teaching them how to hunt? Don’t cross the road until you see the zebra crossing!
What is a cat’s favorite kitchen tool? The whisk-er.
What did the kitten do when she wanted to order something? She looked in the cat-alog!
What do cats do after watching a play? Give a round of a-paws.
I painted a picture of my cat’s feet today.
You could say it was a paw-trait.
What animal has more lives than a cat? A frog … because he croaks every night!
What do you call a cat that works at a printing shop?
A copy cat.
My two cats had a fight today.
They soon hissed and made up though.
What do cats build to prepare for war? Cat-apults.
What did the cat do to someone she had wronged? She a-paw-logized.
Did you hear about the cat who drank 5 bowls of water?
They set a new lap record.
What is a cat’s favorite color? Purr-ple.
What did the cat say when it saw something scary? That freaks meowt!
Why can a leopard never hide for long? It’s always spotted
What do you call a cat that has a hundred legs? A cat-erpillar.
Where does a cat keep its coins? In its purr-se.
Why did the cat keep meow-ing? It didn’t want to be fur-gotten.
What does a cat say when it gets injured? MeOWWW!
Why couldn’t the cat read a book? He was il-litter-ate!
What is a cat’s favorite song? Three blind mice!
What is a cat’s favorite state of America? Connecti-cat.
Did you hear about the cat that ate a ball of yarn? She had a litter of mittens.
How did the kittens express their love for each other? In Holy Catrimony
What do you call a cat teacher? A purr-fessor
What did the cat say when he ate the clownfish? This tastes a little funny!
What is a cat’s favorite book? The Princess and the Paw-per.
What is a cat’s favorite deal? Buy one, get one furry.
Where did the independent cat decide to live? In Catalonia!
What did the happy cat say? Stay paw-sitive!
What is a cat’s favorite piece of artwork? The paw-trait of Meowna Lisa.
What kind of cats love to go bowling? Alley cats!
What is a cat’s favorite type of water? Purr-ified!
What do cats wear to bed? Paw-jamas.
What is a cat’s favorite magazine? Good Mousekeeping.
What did the happy kitten say? I’m feline good!
What’s the difference between a comma and a cat?
One has the paws before the claws, the other has the clause before the pause.
What happened when the kitten turned one? She had a birthday paw-ty.
Why did a person with an unspayed female cat have to go to court?
For kitty littering.
What do you get if you cross a cat with a parrot? A carrot!
Why couldn’t the dog say, “Ahhh”?
Because the cat got his tongue.
What happens to great actors? They get nominated for an a-cat-emy award!
What type of cats usually purr the best? Purr-sians!
What do you call a cat that lives in an igloo? An eskimew!
Why didn’t the boy believe the tiger? Because he thought it was a lion!
Why was the cat kicked out of the game? They thought she was a cheetah.
What is a cat’s favorite type of bird? An e-mew!
What do you use to brush a dead cat? A catacomb!
Why did the cat get fined? He was caught littering
Why did the cat invest in the stock market? He thought is was a good op-paw-tunity
Dogs can’t operate an MRI machine… but catscan.