For my birthday, my kids got me an alarm clock that swears at you instead of beeping.
That was quite a rude awakening.
I know birthdays get worse as you get older. But look at the bright side — not too many left now.
Nobody showed up to my 16th birthday party,
I congratulated him on his win against Polyphemus and we started the party.
I’m a little confused as to why everyone keeps giving me legos for my birthday.
I don’t know what to make of it.
For my wife's birthday, I bought her some beads for her abacus
It's the little things that count.
People keep getting me clocks for my birthday.
Time and time again.
People keep getting me clocks for my birthday.
Time and time again.
My girlfriend made me one of those sculpted 3D cakes for my birthday but wouldn't stop reminding me how it took her all day to decorate it..
..which is surprising since to me it looked like a piece of cake.
Yo momma so fat...
She can't even fit into her Birthday Suit.
I gifted my girlfriend a star for her birthday
I think its perfect, she said she needed some space.
I keep telling my wife I want a Segway for my birthday.
But every time I bring it up, she changes the topic.