Working the poker table at the casino with my new prosthetic hand is going to be a challenge,
But I’ll learn to deal with it.
What do you call a guy that hands out free kebabs to the hungry?
A Döner.
I auditioned to be a carpenter’s hand.
Nailed it.
What do you get when you throw a hand grenade into a French bathroom?
Linoleum Blownapart.
My mother's sister was a gamble who enjoyed poker. She would heartily add to the initial pot but fold after the first hand...
We called her Auntie Up.
What did the police officer say to the hand?
Stop! You are under a wrist!
Exasperated, I threw my hands up in the air and shouted at my wife, "I'm not a complete idiot!" She smiled at me and purred, "I know honey."
"Some parts are missing."
Some guy wanted to charge me a bunch of money for a second hand bouncy house.
But I wasn't sure if that was something I really wanted to jump into.
I was sailing my boat when a massive hand rose out of the water and then slowly disappeared...
I thought, 'That's the biggest wave I've ever seen!'
The guy who invented the watch must have had a lot of time on his hands