A bloke came up to me and said im going to attack you with the neck of my guitar.
I said to him, "is that a Fret"?
Egyptians claimed to have invented the guitar,
But they were such lyres.
What did Prince leave on the neck of his guitar?
Finger prince.
What do you call a distilled botanical that likes to play the guitar??
Ginny Hendrix
My priest fired me from playing guitar with the choir.
Apparently it’s blasphemous to play a Gsus2 chord.
Did you hear about the crook who was stealing guitars from classic rock stars?
He was just arrested for Petty theft.
Ringo, John snd George walked into an electric guitar shop...
They were less Paul.
I tried to play a bass guitar once.
It didn't make much sound, and it slipped out of my hands and swam away.
I really like guitars
They just strike a chord with me.
Why can't Woody play his guitar?
He doesn't know where his Pixar.
Why can't guitars have fun with friends with benefits?
Because without strings attached they just can't play...
After playing guitar for years I thought I could learn to play the piano.
But it's not an easy instrument to pick up.
What kind of cheese is really good at guitar?
Shreddar.
What happened when the guitars got in a fight?
They got in treble.
What do you call a guitar used to play pool?
A cue stick.
What chord does jesus play on guitar?
Gsus
The fisherman was playing his out-of-tune guitar.
Luckily he caught a Tuna
What did the upright bass say to the nervous guitar?
“You’re too high strung, don’t fret.”
What's the difference between a guitar and a fish?
You can tune a guitar but you can't "tuna" fish!
A woman is on trial for beating her significant other with a guitar. “First offender?” the judge asked.
“No” she replied. “First a Gibson , then a Fender”.
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