How do you circumcise a whale?
You send down four skin divers.
Why was the Whale bank heist so successful?
Because it was a whale orca-strated plan
What did the dolphin say to the blue whale?
“Cheer up!”
Which type of whale can fly?
Pilot whales.
Whale, whale, whale …
If it isn’t a pod.
Why can’t you screw with whales?
because they hump back.
What do you get if you cross a whale with an elephant?
A submarine with a built-in snorkel.
What’s an orca’s favorite TV show?
Whale Of Fortune.
What’s a whale’s favorite movie?
The Humpback Of Notre Dame.
What’s a whale’s favorite meal?
Fish and ships.
What do whales do when they get angry?
They blow up and then let off steam.
Have you ever seen a fish cry?
No, but I’ve seen a whale blubber.
What did one beached whale say to the other beached whale?
Long time no sea.
The killer whale planned its attack on the seals for weeks.
It was very carefully orca-strated.
What do whales like to chew?
Blubber gum.
What do polite whales always say?
You’re whale-come.
How do you find out how heavy a whale is?
Take them to a whale-weigh station.
Why did the whale cross the ocean?
To get to the other tide.
Did you know that the blue whale is so big, that if you laid it end to end on a basketball court …
The game would be cancelled.
What’s the difference between a marine biologist and a dog?
One tags a whale, the other wags a tail.
How do whales make a decision?
They flipper coin.
What’s a whale’s favorite James Bond movie?
A License To Krill.
What do you call a group of whale musicians?
An orca-stra.
How do you get two whales in a car?
Start in England and drive west.