What did the turkey say to the man who tried to shoot it? Liberty, Equality and Bad aim for all.
Why did the cranberries turn red?
They saw the turkey dressing!
What did the mama turkey say to her naughty son? If your papa could see you now, he'd turn over in his gravy!
What did the turkey say before it was roasted? Boy! I'm stuffed!
What does Miley Cyrus eat at Christmas? Twerk-ey!
Why did the Beatles stop inviting Ringo to Thanksgiving?
Because he wouldn't share the drumsticks.
What would you get if you crossed a turkey with an evil spirit? A poultrygeist!
Why do turkeys always go, "gobble, gobble"? Because they never learned good table manners!
Why did they let the turkey join the band? Because he had the drumsticks
Why did the turkey NOT cross the road?
To prove that he wasn't chicken.
Why did the police arrest the turkey? They suspected it of fowl play
What's the key to a great Thanksgiving dinner? The turKEY
Why was the UN concerned when the waiter dropped Thanksgiving dinner?
Because it meant the fall of turkey, the ruin of grease, and the breakup of china.
What kind of turkey grows on a tree? Poultry.
What's the best way to stuff a turkey? Serve him lots of pizza and ice cream!
What did the turkeys sing on Thanksgiving Day? God save the kin.
My wife has been giving me a hard time about my drinking. Eventually, I agreed to quit cold turkey.
Never cared for leftovers anyway.
The turkey says, "gobble, gobble."
I appreciate it when food comes with instructions.
Why did the turkey cross the road? It was the chicken's day off!
What key has legs and can't open doors? A Turkey.