What is small, furry and brilliant at sword fights?
A mouseketeer!
What’s a mouse favourite family sitcom?
Full Mouse.
What is small, has a long tail and works with the police?
A gerbil shepherd dog!
How do you save a drowning mouse ?
Use mouse to mouse resuscitation !
Why are elephants scared of computers?
Because of the mouse.
How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?
Squeaky clean!
Why did the mouse eat a candle?
For some light refreshment!
Why did the mouse stay inside? Because it was raining cats and dogs.
How do mice celebrate when they move home? With a mouse warming party!
What do rodents say when they play bingo?
‘Eyes down for a full mouse’!
Who has large antlers, a high voice and wears white gloves? Mickey Moose!
What did the mouse say when his friend broke his front teeth?
Hard cheese!
What is gray, hairy and lives on a mans face? A mouse-tache!
What do you call a mouse who can pick up a horse? Sir!
What’s gray, squeaky and hangs around in caves?
Stalagmice!
Which hotel do mice most often use?
The Stilton.
What do you call a mouse that doesn’t eat, drink, or even walk?
A computer mouse.
Why do mice need oiling?
Because they squeak!
Why do mice have long tails?
Well, they’d look silly with long hair!
What do you call a mouse that doesn’t like being known about-?
Anonymouse.
Who is king of all the mice?
Mouse Tse Tung!
What kind of shoes do mice wear? Squeakers.
What mouse was a Roman emperor? Julius Cheeser!
What do you call a mouse that doesn't eat, drink, or even walk? A computer mouse.
What’s the sequel to that?
Fuller mouse!
Which city do hamsters live in?
Hamsterdam.
What do you call a mouse with no balls?
Optical.