Who do elephants get their Christmas presents from?
Elephanta Claus.
What do you call a light-headed elephant?
An ele-faint.
Why did the elephant ask to borrow a suitcase?
Because he only had a little trunk.
I had a job circumcising elephants.
The base salary wasn't great, but the tips were huge.
What did the grape say when the elephant stood on it?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
Hannibal crossed the Alps because it was safer than crossing the elephants.
What's grey, beautiful and wears glass slippers?
Cinderella-phant.
What do you call an elephant that never washes?
A smelly-phant.
What do you call an elephant that’s never clean?
A smelly-phant.
Looking after more than one elephant at a time requires the ability to multi-tusk.
What do you get when you cross two fish with two elephants?
A pair of swimming trunks.
What’s an elephant’s favorite sport?
Squash.
What do you call a flying elephant?
A jumbo jet.
Anything unrelated to elephants is irrelephant.
Elephants will toil all day, and they work for peanuts.
How do elephants bathe?
With their trunks on.
What animals were last to leave the ark?
The elephants as they had to pack their trunks.
What’s an elephant’s secret talent?
They’re great at multi-tusking.
What's the opposite of an elephant?
An eleph-antonym.
Why don’t elephants use computers?
Because they’re afraid of the mouse.
What do you call an elephant with an aerial on his head?
An elephant-enna.
Hunting elephants is illegal as ivory well know.
What do you call an elephant with rotors?
A Nellie-copter.
An elephant's opinion carries a lot of weight.
What’s big and grey and wears a mask?
The elephantom of the opera.
What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhinoceros?
Eleph-ino! (Sounds like "Hell if I know!")
Why did the elephant start the stampede?
Because it wanted to be herd.