How does a bear get from one place to another?
On a bear-o-plane.
I’ll think of another pun soon…
Just bear with me.
Why don’t bears eat fast food?
Because it’s hard for them to catch.
What do you call a bear who practices dentistry?
A molar bear.
A bear walks into a bear and says, “I’ll have a pint of lager……….. and a packet of crisps.”
The bartender says, “Sure, but what’s with the big pause?”
The bear replies, “I dunno, I was born with them!”
Why did the sloth get fired from his job?
He would only do the bear minimum.
Why do bears have sticky fur?
Because they use honey combs.
How can you tell when a polar bear is moving?
There’s a “fur sale” sign in the yard.
What do you call a bear without any teeth?
A gummy bear.
Goldilocks was killed last night.
The killers did it with their own bear hands.
What does Pooh Bear call his girl friend?
Hunny.
What do you get if you cross a grizzly bear and a harp?
A bear-faced lyre.
Where do polar bears keep their money?
In a snow bank.
What do you call a bear with a bad attitude?
The bearer of bad news.
What do you call a bear with no arms and no legs?
An ambulance. This is no time for jokes.
Why did God create Yogi bear?
Because on his first try he made a Boo-Boo.
What do you call a freezing bear?
A brrrrrrr.
Who is a polar bear’s favorite musician?
Seal.
Where do the teenaged polar bears go to dance?
To the snow-ball.
Why didn’t the teddy bear want any dessert?
He was already stuffed.
What is a bear’s favorite drink?
Koka-Koala.
How do you stop a bear from charging?
Take away its credit cards.
What kind of car does Yogi bear drive?
A Furrari.
What do you call a Mexican bear with a rubber toe?
Robearto.
What do you get if you cross a skunk with a bear?
Winnie the PU!
What do you call a grizzly bear who gets caught in the rain?
A drizzly bear.
What cheese do you use to get a bear out of a tree?
Camembert.
Which animal can hibernate while standing on its head?
Yoga Bear.
How do bears keep their houses cool in summer?
Bear conditioning.
What kind of car do bears drive?
Fur-aris.