The big play is in seven days, you better work on your peach enhancement techniques.
What do you call a bee that makes a milk?
Boo-bee
What did the apple teacher say to her student? Help me orange the chairs please!
Q: Why do peas dislike noisy eaters?
A: Because they want peas and quiet.
How did the Iceland repel the bananas attack? By freezing them
Where do you put nectarines when you want to freeze them? Inside the peach-zer.
"Stop and smell the rosé."
Did you hear about the cow that committed murder? It was in cow-ld blood! How dairy.
What do cherries write in love letters? I miss you cherry-bly.
What do you call cheese that is acting crazy? A basket queso.
Why shouldn't you be too inquisitive with a cherry? Ask no questions tell no pies.
Why does a cow hate artificial milk? Because the substance is pow-dairy.
Do you know how to get a raise at the bread factory? Try buttering up to the boss.
The retiring orchard gardener made a farewell peach that was really heart-warming.
What do you call hot dogs in winter? Chilly dogs!
What’s a potato’s least favorite dance? The Mash Potato.
The chocolate couple decided to rent a two bedroom sweet for their summer honeymoon.
A thesaurus' favorite thing to eat for breakfast is a synonym roll.
Be careful what you say in a corn maze. The walls have ears.
I'm going to tell you all a story about strawberries.....
Once a punnet time....
How is coffee better than a woman?
It goes down way easier.
I hope for world peas.
Can I have some of your avocado?
GUAC NO! I give zero guacs! You need to guac off!
I asked the Korean grocer for something to spice up my meals, but I think I got a raw dill.
What's an egg's favorite movie?
Over Easy Rider.
What do you call a male orange?
Mangerine!
My girlfriend said we aren't getting married until she has a pear shape
It's the reason we cantaloupe
I tried to milk my cow last night, but nothing I did seemed to work. It was an udder failure.
What do you call a lazy spud? A couch potato.
My peach friend shaved for the first time the other day, he looks like a nectarine!
I thought of a new joke that started in a corn field.
But I'm not going to post it bc it's too corny.
In life, the rule of thumb is, don’t bite more than you can chew unless it is chocolate.
Where did Vegans come from?
Hummus Sapiens
Where do Eskimos keep their eggs?
In the egg-loo.
Why did the clock in the donut shop run slow?
It always went back four seconds
What did the worm want to do when he grew up? He wanted to join the Apple Core (Corps).
What do you call a walnut in a narwal costume? A nar-walnut.
What did the oranges do after concluding the meeting?
They peeled the deal.
Q: Why did the pea sell his car?
A: The back seat didn’t have enough legume.
I replaced the milk in the carton with lemon juice. Everyone was really sour about it.
What did the rabbit say to the lettuce?
Romaine calm, I’m here for the carrots.
It is a great idea to ask peaches to make your shoes. After all, they make excellent cobblers.
What nut is always begging for attention?
Pssst-tachios.
What do you call a baby potato? Tater tots!
A strawberry usually needs batteries when it runs out of juice.
What cheese is made backwards?
Edam.
What is a monkey's favorite cookie? Chocolate chimp!
Why can’t people without feet have dairy products? They lactose.
I'm on a seafood diet. Every time I see food, I eat it.
There’s a great new rock and roll cover artist doing the rounds at the moment – his name is Chuck Cherry.