How does the Skywalker family like their tea?
Lukewarm.
My DJ friend took my advice and simplified his salad recipe.
he dropped the beet.
When I told my friend an onion pun, he started crying. I asked whether they were tears of happiness?
What did man say to the guacamole?
Avocado crush on you.
I replaced the milk in the carton with lemon juice. Everyone was really sour about it.
"Read between the wines."
What do you get when you cross a pickle with an alligator?
A crocodill.
What is a pizza’s favorite movie?
Pie hard.
How does a cheese tell you they want to be with you?
“I think you and I would look gouda together.”
What do you get when you cross Elon Musk and lobster bisque? A souped up car.
People order potatoes a lot because they look a-peeling on the menu.
What is a strawberry that likes to spin called? A berry-go-round.
What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Taking a bite and finding half a worm.
Did you hear about the cow that committed murder? It was in cow-ld blood! How dairy.
Why doesn’t the squirrel accept cash or credit at his store? Because it only accepts cash.
What was the event of the onion family getting back together called as? A family reonion.
All potato puns are pomme de terrible.
What is the best way to cook alligator meat? With a croc pot!
What kind of milk do people drink in Mexico? Soy milk.
What do you call a cherry that is hard as nails? Tough as old fruits.
What is ice cream’s preferred breed of dog?
Dashchundae.
I was surprised at the number of onions needed for this dish- it calls for shallot of onions.
What’s a calendars favorite fruit?
Dates.
What’s the best thing you can put in a halloween cookie? Your teeth.
my buddy’s sad after getting fired from taco bell, so being a caring friend i asked if he wanted to
taco bout it?
Knock Knock
Who’s there Justin Justin who? Justin time to make the donuts!
What is a monkey’s favourite cookie?
Chocolate Chimp!
What is a donut’s favorite day of the week?
Fry-day.
I was gonna make a joke about Mediterranean food...
But hummus have missed the mark, and now I falafel.
What do French cherry parents say to their little cherries at home? You are mon cherry.
"Oh, sweet child of wine."
What is a cannibal’s favorite cheese?
Limb-burger.
Do you know what the common thing between a pineapple and a king is? Both of them wear a crown proudly on their top.
"It isn't good to keep things bottled up."
Where does wine catch up on all the vineyard dirt?
Through the grapevine.
Did you hear about the love affair between sugar and cream? It was icing on the cake.
Wino Woe: Forgive me, for I have zinned!
How will the other onions remember the onion that died? It will be forever minced!
Why did the orange become juice?
It couldn't handle the pressure.
Did you hear the one about the apathetic vegetable?
It didn't carrot all.
What kind of ice cream does Dracula eat?
Veinilla.
I was souper excited to hear some soup puns for the comic chef - but his performance did not excite miso much.
What’s the most disgusting type of nut?
The cash-ew.
You’re the tater to my tot. I miss you a lot!
The arrogant baker declared, “You’ll never hear a complaint about my doughnuts outside this shop window.”
The customer agreed, “It must be the double glazing.”
What is the easiest way to make a banana split? Cut it in half.
Why is pumpkin pie so much better than sweet potato pie?
Sweet potatoes are ungourdly.
What do you call a mislabeled orange juice container?
Pulp fiction.
Nut cookies are the best gifts for nutty friends.
What do you call a baby potato? Tater tots!