Did I invite you to the Barbecue?
Then why are you all up in my grill?
Have a s-mash-ing birthday!
What are pig criminals known for? Pigpockets.
Q: What happens to a cherry tree when it grows up?
A: It blossoms
What kind of potato do you want to take home to your parents? A sweet potato.
“I can’t breathe” One potato said to the other. “What happened? ” The other said. The potato replied “I
feel I dropped my nose somewhere”
The mother helped her child bake bread because it was a labor of loaf. True enough.
It is a great idea to ask peaches to make your shoes. After all, they make excellent cobblers.
Why don’t most people enjoy jokes about taco shells?
They’re too corny
I didn’t have a map of the corn maze, so I had to play it by ear.
What did the artichoke say to the man eating a salad? Have a heart.
What do you see at a funeral for a piece of fruit? Apple-bearer.
If you put ice cream on the nutty brownie, you’re serving it ala-mond.
How does Moses make coffee?
Hebrews it.
What do you get when an Elephant sits on an Orange?
Orange squash.
What do you call a very little cherry? Pit-iful.
On Mother's Day we went strawberry picking and made a jam from the fruits of our labor.
I tried finding the dairy factory last night, but I had no luck. I must have lost my whey.
My wife was trying to feed our son a pear, and he was refusing.
I said, Good news. Our son is immune to pear pressure.
What did the cheese say when it looked in the mirror ? Halloumi (Hello me)
What is a monkey's favorite cookie? Chocolate chimp!
Is beef soup good for our health? Not if you are the cow.
Someone asked me recently why I don't put any ketchup or mustard on my hotdog
And I told them it's because I just wanna relish it.
How is bacon like southern Europe?
It's got a lot of Greece in it.
What did the worm want to do when he grew up? He wanted to join the Apple Core (Corps).
I once had a dream that I was swimming in an ocean of carbonated orange juice.
Thankfully it was just a fanta sea.
What's an astronaut's favorite meat? Launch meat!
A cued peach visual communication system is used with people suffering from peach and hearing impairment.
What is ice cream’s favorite TV show?
Game of Cones.
My mother says: “Leave that peach cobbler alone on the table!” However, I cannot help myself and sneak in to watch it making beautiful peach shoes.
I'm not saying you're old, but if you were milk I'd sniff you first.
When she spotted fake ramen in her soup, she said, “ This soup has impasta in it.”
Why should you bake bacon on an asteroid on its way to Earth ?
It's meteor.
What's a barista's favorite exercise at the gym? The French press.
The scientist was meticulous about his strawberry pies. He rounded up the protein content of his pie at 3.14.
Why did the pirate have a pumpkin strapped to his arm?
He was a squash-buckler.
Things don’t always pine out the way we want them to, but we can-nut give up!
I sent my cows to bed at 8pm last night. I told them 'it's pasteur bedtime'.
"I'm not a wino. I'm a wineYES!"
When shouldn't you drink a hot beverage? If it's not your cup of tea.
There was an announcement on the news the other day, we've finally achieved world peas.
I can’t help but laugh a little when I see a pun about chocolate bars… snickers
What do peach soldiers say to each other before they are sent into combat? – “Good luck and make sure you come back in one peach!”
The informant obtained their information by burying themselves in the ground, disguised with a crown and some rind. Police called him the pineapple plant.
Why did the hummus blush?
Because it saw a chickpea!
Which nut is the best at playing tag?
Catch-yous aka cashews.
What song was the peach listening to? 'Stronger with Peach Tear'.
What do you call a fruity pop star? Katy Peary.
Why did a can of nuts win the part in the Christmas pageant? Because they were the best nut-tavity actors.
I just got over my addiction to chocolate, marshmallows and nuts I won’t lie, it was a Rocky Road.