Why can't Superman eat the corn tortillas at taco Tuesday?
He's afraid of that chip tonight.
The peach started acting all funny because it was really fuzzy.
What do you call a watermelon that spends all day at the beauty spa? Must be a hottermmelon.
Did I invite you to the Barbecue?
Then why are you all up in my grill?
What did the nut tell itself before crossing the finish line? “I pe-can do it!”
Why do bacon lettuce and tomatoes have the lowest IQ out of all the foods?
Because they're in-bred.
What do you give a dog with a fever?… Mustard, it’s the best thing for a hot dog.
Q: How do two cherries make up after an argument?
A: They cherry the hatchet.
What happened after an explosion at a French cheese factory? All that was left was de brie.
Do you want to try my soup? I have enough for broth of us!
Which word can be used to describe a peach that is surprised, shocked, or angry with strong emotion? – Speachless!
What did the newspaper say to the ice cream? What's the scoop
What are strange donuts made out of?
Weird-doughs.
What’s the difference between England’s football team and a tea bag
A tea bag stays longer in the cup.
Are avocados good for your heart?
Yes, they make for great avo-cardio.
How did Reese eat her soup? Witherspoon.
A lemon says to an orange, “What are you up to?”
The orange replies, “Not much. Just hanging ‘round.”
What happens to a cherry tree when it grows up? It blossoms.
What do you call a fruit riding a motorcycle?
“An Orange County Chopper.”
A bowl of salad went to church
Lettuce pray.
What is a French cat's favorite dessert? Chocolate mousse!
I switched labels in my wife's spice cabinet.
She hasn't noticed, but the thyme is cumin.
How do the Vietnamese like their soup? Purrrrrfect.
"Are you sure about this?"
"Crust me, I'm on a roll."
How did that avocado baker make bread?
With avoca-dough.
What do baristas say to their least-favorite customers? You mocha me crazy.
Why did he skeleton go to the barbecue? To get another rib.
What does a priest put on his salad?
Lettuce spray.
The daddy strawberry got the job to perform at the circus because he was a berry straw-ng man.
How much does a corn flake weigh?
1 Kelloggram.
What did the banana say to the monkey? Nothing, bananas can't talk!
What do you call a potato that has turned to the dark side? Vader tots!
Soup is only musical when it is piping hot.
Why did the monkey like the banana? Because it had appeal!
What do you call real bacon?
Genuswine
If you are a fan of alphabet soup, then you might also know times new ramen.
What did the farmer say when someone complimented him on his corn harvest?
Aww, shucks!
Apple and orange were the only two left that evening. Everyone else had dates.
I had fresh coconut the last time I went to Hawaii. It’s a tough nut to crack.
What is the name of the horse that a knight onion rides? They ride a scallion.
What did the coffee addict say to his doctor?
I don’t have a problem with coffee. I have a problem without it!
I didn’t have a map of the corn maze, so I had to play it by ear.
How can we tell the difference between a can of beef soup and a can of pork soup? Just read the labels.
What do you get when you cross Frosty with a baker?
Frosty the Dough-Man!
just witnessed a chicken try to pick up a piece of corn for 5 minutes,
ImPeck-able.
I yam what I yam.
What do you call a lamb covered in chocolate? A Candy Baa. Did you hear about the love affair between Mr. Goodbar and Peppermint Patty? They had a baby, Ruth.
What is a cheese lover’s favorite musician?
Mozart-arella.
What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef!
The pie-maker couldn't eat any more strawberries because she was already stuffed.