What’s worse than finding a worm in your pear?
Finding half a worm.
Love is also like a pineapple: They both are undefinable and sweet.
I don't know what happened, but the moment I brought the onion into the kitchen, everything got rejuvenated, and everything started feeling fresh! Guess this really is a spring onion.
When everyone agreed with Hulk at breakfast that they love waffles more, he said, "Not all heroes wear crepes."
The orange juice industry is not doing very well.
Tomorrow they will give a special press release.
Why did the ice cream truck break down?
There was a rocky road.
A lorry load of pears has crashed on the motorway. It’s caused a huge jam.
What did the orange say before jumping into the juicer?
“The zest is yet to come!”
The nut gave her boyfriend the kola shoulder for missing their date.
What's the manliest fruit to eat?
Mango.
What if soy milk is just regular milk that's trying to introduce itself in Spanish?
What do you call a fruit riding a motorcycle?
“An Orange County Chopper.”
Why would the fruits beat the vegetables?
They have a better punch.
How do you get a musician off your front porch?
Pay for the pizza.
Why did the banana go to see the doctor? The banana was not peeling very well.
What's the difference between Hummus and Humus?
"mmmm"
Time to celery-brate.
Where do vegetables keep their money?
In the credit onion.
How can you tell if you are in love?
If they stole a pizza your heart.
The reason orange juice doesn’t slide well on hard wood floors is Because of pulp friction.
The bread actor was sad because he lost a juicy roll.
What was the pumpkin's favorite sport?
Squash.
During the summer break, I enrolled myself in a peach coding course.
"Will you accept this rosé?"
Why shouldn’t you tell a secret on a farm? Because the potatoes have eyes and the corn has ears.
What do you call a potato wearing glasses? A spec-tater!
Q: What kind of desserts does a turkey like?
A: Peach gobbler.
What did the parmesan say when it broke up with the mozzarella?
Sorry but I am too mature for you.
Did you get a side of hummus?
It's a hummuside.
What kind of wine do they serve at the horse races?
Chardon-neigh!
What did the hot dog bun say to the hot dog? Stop touching my buns! What do you call a hot dog with nothing inside it? A "hollow-weenie!"
Peaches tend to be really mean. After all, they have hearts of stone.
To catch a polar bear you surround a hole in the ice with peas
Then, when he goes to take a pea you kick him in the ice hole.
What type of chocolate do they sell at the airport?
Plane Chocolate!
How does a robot eat it’s guacamole?
Microchips.
Did you see the movie about the hot dog? It was an Oscar Wiener.
What did the cherry say when it won its third Olympic gold medal? That's just the cherry on top of a successful career.
Where do bananas go to learn to be sweet?
Sundae School.
What does a cat lady say on Friday night?
I am drinking wine and feline fine!
What do you call super expensive shoes?
Cashews.
What do you call an overly cautious cup of tea?
Uncertaintea.
A turkey's favorite dessert is a strawberry gobbler.
Most of the fruits usually drink their juice with a straw-berry.
How do two cherries make up after an argument? They cherry the hatchet.
Dad Ordered Taco Bell
Asked how many Dillas come in their Ques 'a Dillas
What do we call the period in between eating a peach? – It is called a pit stop.
Why did the orange come back after it was thrown in the garbage?
It was a boom-orange.
Why did the strawberries turned red? Because they saw the salad dressing.
Why did the giant use clouds to make pancakes? To make them light and fluffy.
What is a cowboy’s favorite tree?
A horse chestnut tree.