One day, tamarind, curry and ice were crossing the road. All of a sudden they heard a gunshot. Then, tamabrind ball, curry duck and ice-cream!
He ordered 6 vodkas, 6 beers and 6 lemonades. The bartender asked if he would like a tray.
"No I have enough to carry as it is."
What do you call a stolen yam? A hot potato.
What do you call a chicken with a piece of lettuce in its eye? CHICKEN CAESER SALAD.
Made the mistake of offering my realtor some lipton iced tea
I forgot that he only drinks realty.
When the egg saw the pan, it was terri-fried.
A cream-filled donut and an eclair decided to get a divorce.
It’s a sad story, but the real victims are their children. They’re in for a grueling custardy battle.
Unlike peaches, nectarines don't have any fuzz, because they suffer from Alo-peach-ea.
What is the hippest kind of fruit? A bae-nae-nae.
How do astronauts eat their ice cream? In floats!
I was walking past the store today when I saw a sign saying, "All items one-third off."
So I bought a dozen eggs. Unfortunately four of them were rotten.
My business that sells strawberry juice has gone into liquidation
I earned money by selling broth. Now I am a bouillonaire.
When the strawberry's favorite song came on, he exclaimed "That's my jam!"
Why can't the bankrupt Hindu complain? He's got no beef.
What do pigs drive? Pigup trucks.
Digital burgers are nothing but processed meat.
What do the peanuts and walnuts have in common? They are both nuts.
the difference between a pizza and my pizza jokes?
My pizza jokes can’t be topped!
What do you call a dog with a fever? A hot dog.
If you want to wish a 'Merry Christmas' to a strawberry, just say, "Straw-berry Christmas!'"
What do you call a sad cup of coffee? A depresso.
An organization that citricises its workers cannot get the maximum juice out of them.
Do you want to try my soup? I have enough for broth of us!
Why was the birthday cake as hard as a rock?
Because it was marble cake!
What did the orange say to the lemon?
"'yello!"
Why could I not imagine to have milk in the afternoon? Because it was beyond my wildest creams.
Drinking tea while being too calm can kill you, did you know?
It's called a casual tea.
Why are apples afraid to grow in the United States? Because they don't want to be as American as apple pie.
my buddy’s sad after getting fired from taco bell, so being a caring friend i asked if he wanted to
taco bout it?
Did you hear about the love affair between sugar and cream? It was icing on the cake.
A burglar broke into my house and took all my condiments, now I'm Spiceless in Seattle.
What do you call a rifle that shoots salt?
A salt rifle.
Did you see the movie about the hot dog? It was an Oscar Wiener.
What kind of evidence can a donut not take to trial?
Anecdoughtal evidence.
“My favorite color is tangerine- isn’t that orange-inal?”
The students were going nuts when they saw all the assignments due in the curri-kola-m.
What do potatoes become when they smoke weed?
Baked potatoes.
Why did he skeleton go to the barbecue? To get another rib.
I can’t help but laugh a little when I see a pun about chocolate bars… snickers
Why are oranges the smartest fruit?
Because they are made to concentrate.
Happy Birthday to my best spud….get it? ? Spud…bud? ?
I met him yesterday, he was on his way to meet the counselor for a peach therapy session.
What word backwards can predict the future? Cookies (Seikooc as in psychic of you say it).
What do you call a barking pumpkin?
A gourd dog.
What's an egg's favorite tree?
A y-oak tree.
Today, I am eating a bun filled with pineapple and ham for my dinner. That is Hawaii roll.
How good is a Coney Island gyro? Feta than se*.
Everyone needs to eat bread because loaf is what makes the world go round. Loaf truly is.
What’s the opposite of coffee?
Sneezy.