The squirrel’s chest got dirty with nuts, now it has a chest-nut.
What do you call a cup of leaf juice that doesn’t want to be a dad?
Absent-tea parent.
Why did I start making a cherry pie? Bake-cause I love it.
Why did the man go into the pizza business?
He wanted to make some dough.
The soup was busy and preoccupied. He was stewing over something his friend said.
If you want to ask someone to borrow their peas, you have to say pea-lease.
Did you know there’s an app for corn growers?
It’s made in Sili-corn Valley!
Potatoes have skin. I have skin. Ergo, I am a potato
What do you call a fruit riding a motorcycle?
“An Orange County Chopper.”
What’s the perfect gift for someone who is always raisin’ the bar? Oatmeal
raisin.
Why do oranges wear suntan lotion? They peel in the sun.
Who wrote the book "Great Egg-spectations"?
Charles Chickens.
Breakfasts with my family always feel like a party because they're always making toasts.
The pancake thought he was the best breakfast food because nobody stacked up to him.
The peach started acting all funny because it was really fuzzy.
On my farm, an entire lot of onions had some allergic reactions that broke out in chives!
What do you call Chewbacca when he has chocolate stuck in his hair? Chocolate Chip Wookiee.
Wine Lovers Rhyme: A friend of wine is a friend of mine!
What did the lemon juice say to the baking soda?
Ya basic!
Did you hear about the banana who went to the doctor's because he wasn't peeling very well?
What do you get when you put the number 3.14 in the middle of the onions? You get o-pi-nions!
Why didn’t the mom peanut give her children a nutty chocolate bar? Because the sugar makes them bounce off the wal-nuts.
What do you call a group of cows that are on top of a hill? High steaks.
I'm going to tell you all a story about strawberries.....
Once a punnet time....
Don’t ask me why I love wine. I have my rieslings.
When the little boy was baking a cake why did it run away? Because it said crack 2 eggs then beat it!
What do you call a mislabeled orange juice container?
Pulp fiction.
One bowl of soup said to the other, "Hello Broth-er".
During the summer break, I enrolled myself in a peach coding course.
In the middle of the night yesterday, I dreamt that I was swimming in a sea of oranges only to wake up and realize that it was just a Fanta-sea.
What do you do with epileptic lettuce? You make a seizure salad!
I think it’s funny when I ask girls whether they would spit or swallow my seed if I was a watermelon. Unfortunately, almost all of them reply not in a hundred melon years.
What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? Anyone can roast beef.
What did mamma orange say to little orange after he spilled his milk? It’s no big peel!
What do you call a group of men waiting for a haircut? A barbercue.
The soup that my mom made for dinner healed my flu in a day. It was almost soup-er natural.
It’s not often that you find an eye anywhere but on the face. Cows, however, have a rib eye.”
Q: Who is Peach’s favorite actor?
A: Brad Pit.
What do you call a hot dog race? Wiener takes all.
What’s a nut’s favorite Shakespeare line?
“To be or nut to be.”
I squeezed the innards of a pumpkin into a glass, and the result was just beautiful
In fact, it was gourdjuice.
What do you call a lamb covered in chocolate? A Candy Baa. Did you hear about the love affair between Mr. Goodbar and Peppermint Patty? They had a baby, Ruth.
Knock knock!
Who’s there? Doughnut. Doughnut Who? Doughnut forget to close the door!
How is coffee better than a woman?
It goes down way easier.
How do monsters like their eggs?
Terri-fried.
I've just got my hand stuck in a jar of gherkins and I can't get it out.
I'm in a right pickle!
I came across a man who was eating strawberries at the bank. He told me he wanted to eat rich food.
What do horses like to put on their egg salad sandwiches?
MayoNAYS!
I’m a wrapper, so I get a lot of dough. A bread wrapper, that is.
What do you call young avocados?
Avokiddos.