What did baby clock ask mama clock? Where's father Thyme.
What fruit loves chocolate?
A cocoa nut.
Why did the slice of bread leave her boyfriend? She thought that he was just too knead-y.
What do you call bacon with salt on it
Salt and Peppa
Why couldnt the pumpkin have kids?
He had a halloweener.
What do fruit wear when they go swimming? A one-peach bathing suit.
I don’t wanna taco ‘bout it
If fish is a type of brain food, then dumb people probably love eating noodle soup.
I like fried chickpeas, but I shouldn't eat them. Every time I do I falafel.
Why’d the lettuce blush?
It saw the salad dressing.
One strawberry said to the other, “Were it not that you were so sweet, you wouldn’t have ended up in this jam.”
Did you know dried fruits favorite news segments is...
Current events.
What do you call a cow that doesn’t produce any milk? A milk dud!
What do fruit bowls say when they dress up as a ghost on Halloween? Be cherry afraid!
How do eggs get around?
On a s-egg-way.
The peach was late for work because it had to make some pit stops on the way.
What do you call a Vegetarian with diarrhea? A Salad Shooter.
What do you get when you spice up date night? Netflix and Chilis.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Peanut.
Peanut who?
Peanut butter open the door!
What do you call a pig thats wrong? Mistaken bacon.
The hotdog severely fell behind in school which is why he has to ketchup.
Where do you go to learn how to make ice cream?
Sundae school.
How should you live your life? By seasoning the moment.
What do you call referential cheese?
Feta.
Where does wine catch up on all the vineyard dirt?
Through the grapevine.
What kind of tea did the American colonists want? Liberty.
Strawberries are berry healthy. They pack a punch when it comes to beating cancer and other diseases.
What do bread kids say during hide-and-seek?
Bready or not, here I crumb!
Where do astronauts buy their milk? From the milky way!!!
What's an egg's favorite movie?
Over Easy Rider.
Be careful! Theres a deadly fruit on the loose
He has 7 charges of armed Strawbbery.
An owner of a pizza shop has just been found dead covered with pineapple, ham, mushrooms, and pepperoni. Word is that he topped himself.
Sheep have a clever way of keeping all their four feet warm in the winter; they wear muttons.
Cow's that eat strawberries give strawberry milk.
I’m zesting a lemon for a recipe right now
It’s really appealing
What did the cornfield say when it heard rain coming?
That’s music to my ears!
Chefs earn a meager celery, cumin home beat they just want to read the pepper and spend thyme with the kids.
What do you call a fat kid who likes chocolate milk?
An OvalTeen
Did you know that bread that you make into buns is always relaxed? Yes, they just like to roll with it.
Q: Did you hear about the pea that changed careers?
A: He went into a different field!
What do you call chick peas in a cavern?
Humus Sapiens
Why did the coffee bean keep checking his watch? Because he was pressed for time.
I mashed a few mangoes, pineapples, melons, strawberries, and grapes into a pot. Served the mash to guests visiting my place.
Called the dish, Mea Pulpa.
Why do the French eat snails? They dislike fast food.
How did the nut study for its test?
It used the inter-nut.
How did the fruit get to Hawaii? The pineapple express.
Eating no meat except fish is really bothersome.
I should stop being a Pesky-tarian.
What do we call two thousand pounds of Chinese soup? It is called won – ton!
What did the nut husband tell his wife? “Nut-ing lasts forever, except my love for you!”
What kind of ice cream to electricians eat?
Shock a lot.