Why did the cheese lover hide cheese in the back of his fridge?
In queso emergency.
What do you call cheese that is acting crazy? A basket queso.
What happens when you go on an all-cheese diet?
You cheddar few pounds.
When shouldn't you believe a word your cheese is saying? When it's too Gouda to be true.
What’s a good way to start a conversation with a cheese plate on Tinder?
“Hello. Is it brie you’re looking for?”
What cheese do beavers like? eDam
What does a cheese lover say when someone keeps messing around with them?
“You gouda brie kidding!”
Why did the cheese shop owner finally quit the business?
He was tired of the daily rind.
Did you hear about the cheese lover who took his girlfriend for granted?
How dairy.
How does the Cheese Detective choose his clients?
On a queso by queso basis.
What do they say when you leave the cheese store?
Have a gouda day!
What did the commedian say after after a bad set?
That crowd was laughtose intolerant.
Did you hear what happened when the decorator painted his wife with cheese? He double Gloucester!
What is a cheese lover’s favorite type of music?
R n’ Brie.
What do you tell your friend after she breaks up with a cheese lover?
You’re cheddar off without him!
What does a cheese say when they look in the mirror in the morning?
Halloumi.
What kind of cheese makes the best music?
Brieoncé.
Did you hear about the guy who had an addiction to cheddar cheese?
It was only mild.
Which is the Richest Cheese in the world? Paris Stilton.
What did the Cheese salesman say? That cheese may be Gouda, but this one is Feta!
Why did the parmesan swipe left on the cheddar?
His pick-up line was too cheesey.
What kind of cheese do alcoholics eat?
Livarot.
What cheese should you use to hide a horse? Mascarpone.
What activity should you do when you’re babysitting little cheeses?
Build a roquefort.
What did Shakespeare say as he was making a cheese plate?
To brie or not to brie.
What wisdom did the daddy cheese pass down to his son?
A curd in the hand is worth two in the bush.
What did one cheese tell the other cheese on Valentine’s day?
Brie mine.
What did the street cheese say after he got attacked by several blades? I've felt grater.
What kind of cheese to beavers eat?
Edam.
Why does cheese look normal? Because everyone else on the plate is crackers.
What pickup line can you use to pick up a cheese lover?
“Are you cheddar? ‘Cause you’re lookin’ sharp!”
Why doesn't cheddar like to party with crackers? Someone always cuts the cheese.
How do you get a mouse to smile? Say cheese!
What did the cheese say after escaping the mouse? I'm Brieeee!
What do you call a grilled cheese sandwich that's all up in your face? Too close for comfort food.
Why should you always bring a bag of tortilla chips to a party?
In queso emergency.
Why was the cheese asked to leave the restaurant?
The cook said “we don’t serve your rind here”.
What did the grilled cheese sandwich say to their date?
“You make me melt.”
What did the cheese say to the other cheese? I smell something swiss-picious!
What cheese surrounds a medieval castle? Moatzeralla
How do you know it’s getting kind of serious with a cheese lover?
They tell you they are pretty fondue you.
What is Tom Hanks' favourite soft cheese? Philadelphia.
What does a real cheese freak say when they come to your door?
“I’d like to talk to you about Cheesus.”
What is a cheese lover’s favorite track and field event?
The curdles.
What's the most popular American cheese sitcom? Curd Your Enthusiasm
What is a cheese’s favorite kind of philosophy?
Epistemology and fetaphysics.
What is a lions favourite cheese? Roar-quefort.
What do you get when you cross a goblin and cheese? Muenster cheese.
What cheese is made backwards?
Edam.
What kind of cheese do rodents like? Mousearella.