Why should you always bring a bag of tortilla chips to a party?
In queso emergency.
What do you get when you cross a goblin and cheese? Muenster cheese.
How do you know it’s getting kind of serious with a cheese lover?
They tell you they are pretty fondue you.
What does a cheese like to drink after a long day?
Morbier.
What did the cheese call himself after he got dumped?
Forever provolone.
What do you call a cheese that is an alcoholic? Livarot
How does the Cheese Detective choose his clients?
On a queso by queso basis.
What drives cheese crazy?
That everyone around them is crackers.
What were the cheese’s wedding vows?
To havarti and to hold.
Did you hear about the cheese shop that was destroyed by a tornado?
All that’s left is da brie.
Why didn’t the chef slice his cheese?
He had grater plans.
What does a lady in a mall do with a cheesey credit card? Go on a shopping brie.
What is a pirate’s favorite cheese?
Ched-arrrrgh!
Where should you call if you find a bad cheese shop?
The feta business bureau.
How do you know when a cheese is full of himself?
Whatever you say, he’ll say he is feta.
What did the grilled cheese sandwich say to their date?
“You make me melt.”
What happened after an explosion at a French cheese factory? All that was left was de brie.
Why couldn’t the cheese sleep?
He was scared there was a munster under the bed.
What did Shakespeare say as he was making a cheese plate?
To brie or not to brie.
What do you feed the son of god? Cheeses of Nazareth.
What did the Cheese salesman say? That cheese may be Gouda, but this one is Feta!
Which search engine is popular amongst mice? Ask Cheese.
When should you go on a cheese diet? If you need to cheddar a few pounds
What does a piece of cheese tell you during a game of tag?
Cheez it.
Why does the Pope love Swiss cheese so much?
It’s hole-y.
What is a lion’s favorite cheese?
Roarquefort.
What did the blind man say after being handed a cheese grater? "That's the most violent book I've ever read."
What kind of cheese protects a castle?
Moat-zarella.
What do you call a flying cheese?
A curd of prey.
When shouldn't you believe a word your cheese is saying? When it's too Gouda to be true.
What is the name of the country near Iraq that is made entirely of cheese? Curd-istan
What happens when you go on an all-cheese diet?
You cheddar few pounds.
What Welsh cheese must you always eat with caution? Caerphilly
Saw a great offer on cheese in Tesco today!
It was buy one get one brie.
How did the cheese professor start class every day?
Oh queso…
Which is the Richest Cheese in the world? Paris Stilton.
What is Tom Hanks' favourite soft cheese? Philadelphia.
What is a cheese’s favorite kind of philosophy?
Epistemology and fetaphysics.
What did the commedian say after after a bad set?
That crowd was laughtose intolerant.
What did one cheese tell the other cheese on Valentine’s day?
Brie mine.
What do you call cheese who attends art openings?
Cultured.
What kind of cheese makes the best music?
Brieoncé.
Did you hear about the cheese failed to medal at the olympics? It fell at the final curdle
I have an addiction to cheddar cheese.
But it's only mild.
What do you tell a cheese going through a hard time?
Ricotta get through this.
What did the aged cheddar say when his mom told him he couldn’t see a movie that was rated R?
“I’m mature for my age.”
What is a cheese lover’s favorite type of music?
R n’ Brie.
Did you hear about the cheese factory that exploded? De-brie went everywhere!
Did you hear about the guy who had an addiction to cheddar cheese?
It was only mild.
What's the most popular American cheese sitcom? Curd Your Enthusiasm
