What happened after an explosion at a French cheese factory? All that was left was de brie.
Did you hear about the cheese lover who took his girlfriend for granted?
How dairy.
What cheese cries the most?
Babybel.
What is a cheese lover’s favorite Village People song?
Nacho Man.
What is a cheese lover’s favorite track and field event?
The curdles.
Did you hear about the guy who opened up a store where they only sell Swiss cheese?
It’s a hole business strategy.
What do you call cheese who attends art openings?
Cultured.
What is a cheese lover’s favorite rap artist?
Feta wap.
When shouldn't you believe a word your cheese is saying? When it's too Gouda to be true.
How did the cheese get such curly hair?
It got a permasan.
Which search engine is popular amongst mice? Ask Cheese.
What does a cheese say when you ask him to share a secret?
He cantal.
Which is the most religious cheese? Swiss, because it is holy.
What kind of cheese do alcoholics eat?
Livarot.
Saw a great offer on cheese in Tesco today!
It was buy one get one brie.
What’s a good way to start a conversation with a cheese plate on Tinder?
“Hello. Is it brie you’re looking for?”
Why couldn’t the cheese sleep?
He was scared there was a munster under the bed.
What wisdom did the daddy cheese pass down to his son?
A curd in the hand is worth two in the bush.
Why did the wheel act so bossy? Cause he was the "Big Cheese."
What cheese is made backwards?
Edam.
What did the blind man say after being handed a cheese grater? "That's the most violent book I've ever read."
Why didn’t I believe what the cheese salesman told me?
It was too gouda to be true.
Why didn’t the chef slice his cheese?
He had grater plans.
Why was the cheese asked to leave the restaurant?
The cook said “we don’t serve your rind here”.
What do you call cheese that is sad? Blue cheese.
What is a lion’s favorite cheese?
Roarquefort.
How do you get a mouse to smile? Say cheese!
What cheese should you use to hide a horse? Mascarpone.
What do you call a piece of cheese that likes to shoot hoops? Swiss!
What kind of cheese makes the best music?
Brieoncé.
What pickup line can you use to pick up a cheese lover?
“Are you cheddar? ‘Cause you’re lookin’ sharp!”
What covers the floor of the motzarella forest?
Cheese sticks.
What do you get when you cross a smurf and a cow?
Blue cheese.
What is a basketball players favorite kind of cheese? Swish cheese!
What does a lady in a mall do with a cheesey credit card? Go on a shopping brie.
What do you tell your friend after she breaks up with a cheese lover?
You’re cheddar off without him!
How did the cheese professor start class every day?
Oh queso…
What do you call a grilled cheese sandwich that's all up in your face? Too close for comfort food.
What cheese do beavers like? eDam
How do you share a piece of cheese with a bear?
Caerphilly.
What did the mom cheese tell the little boy cheese when he got hurt on his bike?
“Gotta take the gouda with the bad.”
What Welsh cheese must you always eat with caution? Caerphilly
Why doesn’t anyone like to hang out with crackers?
Someone always cuts the cheese.
What did the commedian say after after a bad set?
That crowd was laughtose intolerant.
Did you hear about the cheese factory that exploded? De-brie went everywhere!
What did the grilled cheese sandwich say to their date?
“You make me melt.”
Did you hear about the cheese failed to medal at the olympics? It fell at the final curdle
How do you know when a cheese is full of himself?
Whatever you say, he’ll say he is feta.
Why does the Pope love Swiss cheese so much?
It’s hole-y.
What did Shakespeare say as he was making a cheese plate?
To brie or not to brie.