Did you hear about the guy who opened up a store where they only sell Swiss cheese?
It’s a hole business strategy.
What did the mom cheese tell the little boy cheese when he got hurt on his bike?
“Gotta take the gouda with the bad.”
What do you tell a cheese going through a hard time?
Ricotta get through this.
What do you call a grilled cheese sandwich that's all up in your face? Too close for comfort food.
What did the street cheese say after he got attacked by several blades? I've felt grater.
What did one cheddar cheese say to the other cheddar cheese at prom?
Looking sharp!
Why did the wheel act so bossy? Cause he was the "Big Cheese."
What do they say when you leave the cheese store?
Have a gouda day!
What did the cheese say to the other cheese? I smell something swiss-picious!
What did the Cheese salesman say? That cheese may be Gouda, but this one is Feta!
Why doesn’t anyone like to hang out with crackers?
Someone always cuts the cheese.
How do you get a mouse to smile?
Say cheese.
How did the cheese professor start class every day?
Oh queso…
How do you get a mouse to smile? Say cheese!
When should you go on a cheese diet? If you need to cheddar a few pounds
When shouldn't you believe a word your cheese is saying? When it's too Gouda to be true.
Saw a great offer on cheese in Tesco today!
It was buy one get one brie.
What is a lions favourite cheese? Roar-quefort
What kind of cheese do alcoholics eat?
Livarot.
What do you tell your friend after she breaks up with a cheese lover?
You’re cheddar off without him!
How do you know when a cheese is full of himself?
Whatever you say, he’ll say he is feta.
What is a basketball players favorite kind of cheese? Swish cheese!
What did the grilled cheese sandwich say to their date?
“You make me melt.”
When do they smother a burrito in cheese? In best queso scenario.
Did you hear about the cheese failed to medal at the olympics? It fell at the final curdle
Did you hear about the cheese shop that was destroyed by a tornado?
All that’s left is da brie.
What is Tom Hanks' favourite soft cheese? Philadelphia.
What does a lady in a mall do with a cheesey credit card? Go on a shopping brie.
What do you feed the son of god? Cheeses of Nazareth.
Do you want to hear a pizza joke? Never mind it's too cheesy.
What kind of cheese do rodents like? Mousearella.
What do cheese makers dance to on halloween? The muenster mash!
What do you call a piece of cheese that likes to shoot hoops? Swiss!
What do you call an oriental cheese? Parm-asian
What cheese should you use to hide a horse? Mascarpone.
What does a cheese say when you ask him to share a secret?
He cantal.
What hotel do cheese lover’s stay in?
The Stilton.
What did one cheese tell the other cheese on Valentine’s day?
Brie mine.
I have an addiction to cheddar cheese.
But it's only mild.
Which is the Richest Cheese in the world? Paris Stilton.
What is a cannibal’s favorite cheese?
Limb-burger.
What did one cheese say to the other during philosophy class?
“I dis a brie.”
What kind of cheese to beavers eat?
Edam.
How do you know it’s getting kind of serious with a cheese lover?
They tell you they are pretty fondue you.
What does a cheese lover say when someone keeps messing around with them?
“You gouda brie kidding!”
What do you call cheese who attends art openings?
Cultured.
What does a cheese say when they look in the mirror in the morning?
Halloumi.
Did you hear what happened when the decorator painted his wife with cheese? He double Gloucester!
What cheese is made backwards?
Edam.
What is a cheese’s favorite kind of philosophy?
Epistemology and fetaphysics.