Like a pro wrestler in a headlock, I’m indulging in a little Sham pain.
"You are so bottlefull to me."
"Be kind, re-wine."
"Hakuna Moscato. It means drink wine."
"Chardonnay or should I go?"
"I mead more wine."
Fine Wine Pick-Up Line: Hey babe, what are you doing this fall? 'Cause I'd like to make you part of the season's harvest.
"Rosé all day."
Are there any funny red wine puns at BabaMail Jokes?
You bet Shiraz there are!
"Love the wine you're with."
"Alcohol you later."
"Let's get fizzical. Pass the prosecco."
Oh no! My wine glass is empty. Somebody call Wine-One-One!
My doctor said I need to change my diet. He said I should eat more more caviar and drink more champagne. So, I said, "That's insane! What kind of a diet is that?" He replied, "It's called a High Fluten Diet."
"I need to re-wine my life."
You’re wine in a million.
"Will you accept this rosé?"
Why did Mrs. Wine Grape run away from home?
She was tired of raisin a family.
"Stop and smell the rosé."
"Time to wine down."
"Here for the right riesling."
Did you hear about the crime family that took over the wine importing business?
They call themselves the Sip-ranos!
"Great minds drink alike."
Don’t ask me why I love wine. I have my rieslings.
"Sip, sip hooray."
Do librarians like white wine?
No, they like theirs well red!
"Another glass? Wine not?!"
Why did the wine connoisseur insist on drinking from an old tire?
He heard it was a Goodyear!
"No wine left behind."
"Is that a yay or cabernet?"
Somehow they knew I wanted champagne. It was chilling.
"Oh, sweet child of wine."
What do you call the guy who chooses a suitable fortified Spanish wine?
A Sherry Picker.
Why does your grandma like wine so much?
Because at her age, she needs glasses!
My wife hates it when I mess with her red wine. I added fruit and orange juice, and now she sangria than ever!
I like my wine sweet and my humor dry.
How did the vineyard launch the new champagne making business?
They crashed a small boat into it.
Which mammal absolutely loves Merlot and Cabernet?
The Wineoceros.
Where do connoisseurs lock up their best bottles?
In a wine cabernet.
"Giving you more reasons to wine."
"Wine a little, laugh a lot."
"Adulting makes me wine."
Why was the white wine's off-beat pun so boo-ed?
Because it was too corky.
Remember to stop and smell the rosé.
Wine Connoisser Point to Ponder: Did Marilyn drink Merlot?
Some people like beer goggles. I prefer wine glasses.
"Back that glass up."
Why do winos love cheap wine puns?
Because wine snobs hate them!
Why have less scato when you can have mo’ scato?
.
I’m not old. I’m aged to perfection. And full bodied.