Who is a potato’s favorite author? Edgar Allen Poe-tato.
If you’re looking for potato puns, you can count on me to chip in.
How does a potato win at Street Fighter? By mashing the kick button.
What’s a potatoes favorite horror movie? The Silence of the Yams.
What do you call a spinning potato? A rotate-o.
I love you a tot!
What’s a potato’s least favorite dance? The Mash Potato.
What do you call a potato wearing glasses? A spec-tater!
Where does a potato go to college? DeFry
Why shouldn’t you tell a secret on a farm? Because the potatoes have eyes and the corn has ears.
John, you have so much po(tato)tential!
“How was your day? ” “It was tater-ible”
Tony, where do I even starch? I yam so happy we’re best spuds!
What do potatoes become when they smoke weed?
Baked potatoes.
Potato puns are a-peeling.
What kind of potatoes are in the best shape? Hash browns; they’re totally shredded!
What do you call a stolen yam? A hot potato.
“How was your day? ” “It was a total disas-tater”
“We are experiencing slight tuber-lence on the flight”
What do you call an everyday potato? A commentater!
How do you know when a potato is high? When it looks baked!
Everything in this world is either a potato or not a potato
Why do potatoes make good detectives? Because they keep their eyes peeled.
I yam rooting for you my sweet potato and I won't mash your heart
What do you call a person who spends a lot of time sitting and staring at potatoes? A medi-tator.
When it started raining, I spotted a potato across the road pretty fast and I wondered what’s up? It wasn’t long before I saw a fork up ahead.
“How are you? ” “Well, I yam fried”
Potatoes have skin. I have skin. Ergo, I am a potato
Why was the sweet potato too shy to ask out the russet potato? Because he was a real spud.
“I can’t breathe” One potato said to the other. “What happened? ” The other said. The potato replied “I
feel I dropped my nose somewhere”
What do you say to an angry 300-pound baked potato? Anything, just butter him up.
What do you call a potato that smokes weed? A baked potato.
Thanks to you, I’m saddled with unnecessary peelings.
I like you a latke!
I miss you! I’ll see you tater!
Why didn’t the mother potato want her daughter to marry the famous newscaster? Because he was a common-tater.
If we played hot potato I’d lose, because I’d never let you go.
What kind of potato do you want to take home to your parents? A sweet potato.
Why don't potatoes go to parties?
They're scared of the Monster Mash.
I yam always very happy to eat sweet potatoes.
What do you get when it rains potatoes? Spuddles.
What do you call a baby potato? Tater tots!
When potato chips don’t sell fast enough, the maker knows it will soon be crunch time.