Why wouldn’t the reporter leave the mashed potatoes alone? He desperately wanted a scoop.
Say this aloud: Eye Yam Stew Peed
Why did the potato wear socks?
To keep his pota-toes warm.
Have a s-mash-ing birthday!
Tony, where do I even starch? I yam so happy we’re best spuds!
What kind of potatoes are in the best shape? Hash browns; they’re totally shredded!
What’s a potato’s favorite TV program? Starch Trek.
How do you know when a potato is in a bad mood? When they are acting salty
Why was the sweet potato too shy to ask out the russet potato? Because he was a real spud.
Who is a potato’s favorite author? Edgar Allen Poe-tato.
I miss you! I’ll see you tater!
What do you call a stolen yam? A hot potato.
What kind of potato do you want to take home to your parents? A sweet potato.
Where does a potato go to college? DeFry
Why didn’t the mother potato want her daughter to marry the famous newscaster? Because he was a common-tater.
How do you know when a potato is high? When it looks baked!
“How was your day? ” “It was a total disas-tater”
If you’re looking for potato puns, you can count on me to chip in.
What is a potato’s life philosophy? I think, therefore I yam.
Boil ’em, mash ’em, stick ’em in a stew. Happy Birthday from me to you!
Thanks to you, I’m saddled with unnecessary peelings.
What do you call a baby potato? Tater tots!
If we played hot potato I’d lose, because I’d never let you go.
What is a potato’s favorite baseball team? The New York Yamkees
I like you a latke!
“I can’t breathe” One potato said to the other. “What happened? ” The other said. The potato replied “I
feel I dropped my nose somewhere”
Potato puns are a-peeling.
How does a potato win at Street Fighter? By mashing the kick button.
What do you call a person who spends a lot of time sitting and staring at potatoes? A medi-tator.
What do potatoes become when they smoke weed?
Baked potatoes.
Why was the potato put in an asylum? It was starch raving mad.
What do you call a lazy spud? A couch potato.
I met a girl that owned three french-fry factories. I was impressed but to her it was just small potatoes.
We’re a perfect mash.
What do you call an everyday potato? A commentater!
Who is the most powerful potato? Darth Tater.
Time fries when you’re having fun!
What’s a potato’s least favorite dance? The Mash Potato.
What’s a potatoes favorite horror movie? The Silence of the Yams.
When it started raining, I spotted a potato across the road pretty fast and I wondered what’s up? It wasn’t long before I saw a fork up ahead.
What do you get when if you cross a potato and the terminator?
A termitator.
What do you call a potato at a football game? A spec-tater.
What do you call a potato wearing glasses? A spec-tater!
What did the daddy potato say to his son before his soccer game? I’m rooting for you!
“We are experiencing slight tuber-lence on the flight”
I yam rooting for you my sweet potato and I won't mash your heart
All potato puns are pomme de terrible.
Everything in this world is either a potato or not a potato
What do you call a potato that has turned to the dark side? Vader tots!
What do you call a potato that smokes weed? A baked potato.