What do you call a punctual citrus fruit?
A Clockwork Orange.
Despite the pun being so orange-inal, it wasn’t all that funny.
I’ve got a great idea for an automatic orange peeling machine I hope it bares fruit.
What happened when the orange broke out of prison?
All heck broke juice.
Why don’t oranges go around blind?
“Because they take Vitamin See!”
What do you call fake oranges?
“Pulp Fiction”
Why did the orange go to the doctor?
“It wasn’t peeling well.”
What do you call a male orange?
Mangerine!
What did the orange say before jumping into the juicer?
“The zest is yet to come!”
Where were the first orange trees planted?
“In Orange County.”
Why did the orange fall out of the tree?
It went out on a limb.
Finally, the call came in and the orange was informed by the person on the other end of the line that the company had orange-d an interview for the following day.
The orange was really sad at the event because it had no peelings whatsoever for the desperate prune.
Oranges rarely pass driving tests, this is because they keep on peeling out.
The favorite drink for batman is a fruit punch.
When you come across oranges wearing suntan lotion, don’t judge them harshly. They do so in order not to peel.
What did the orange say when a knife pierced it’s peel? Flesh wound.
What is the healthiest fruit?
“An orange. It takes Vitamin See!”
What did the orange do the night before the exam?
He put his nose to the “g-rind-stone” and read the entire textbook.
Why do oranges wear suntan lotion? They peel in the sun.
When I was in grade school, one of my best friends spoke Mandarin. One day, he introduced me to his parents and I told them I don’t speak orange.
Why did the orange lose the race?
“Because it got Im-peached.”
What would Santa’s name be if he wore orange instead of red?
Fanta Claus.
The fruit bat ate the orange because of its appeal. It had such a nice color.
Why did the fruit bat eat the orange?
“Because it had appeal.”
Why did the orange help the old lady cross the road?
To do a random act of rindness.
Why was red in awe of orange?
“Because orange blue green.”
He apologized for driving the orange to the edge of the blade
Q: Why couldn’t the orange believe that her friend had let her down?
A: This was because citrus-ted him!
Why did the worker get fired from the orange juice factory?
“Lack of concentration.”
What did the orange say before he started his new job?
“The zest is yet to come!”
The oranges hadn’t been peeling well for a week when they finally decided to seek medical attention.
What did mamma orange say to little orange after he spilled his milk? It’s no big peel!
Why did the blonde stare at the carton of orange juice? It said concentrate.
Q: Why can’t oranges be pirates?
A: They don’t get scurvy.
Which Star Wars character was the orange cast for?
Emperor Pulpatine.
Why couldn’t the orange dance in the talent show without his partner?
Because it takes two to “tang-o.”
Q: What did the old orange see before it died?
A: The grim ripe-r.
Knock, knock! Who’s there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad to see me?
An organization that citricises its workers cannot get the maximum juice out of them.
Which language do oranges use to speak to each other? Mandarin.
I was throwing oranges at tropical birds. One of them caught one then said: “Toucan play that game”
When the orange started peeling, he was glad it was finally cutting some weight.
Apple and orange were the only two left that evening. Everyone else had dates.
Why did the orange turn into orange juice?
It couldn’t handle the pressure.
Did you hear about the orange boxer?
He got beaten to a pulp.
Why did the orange get pulled over while driving?
He kept peeling out.
What happens when you rub two oranges together?
You get Pulp Friction.
Knock, knock! Who’s there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock Who’s there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock Who’s there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn’t say banana?
What do you get when an Elephant sits on an Orange?
Orange squash.