Some types of meat like to play around a lot. These are generally the game types.
Eating no meat except fish is really bothersome.
I should stop being a Pesky-tarian.
What do you get when you cross a chicken and a cow? Roost beef!
What do you call a group of butchers coming together? A meating.
What is a snowman’s favorite type of burger? A chilli cheese burger with iceberg lettuce.
What did the steak say when he came across his nemesis? Ah, we meat again!”
Two hot dogs were having a race. One overtook the other, who called out “I see you’ve mustard the strength to ketchup with me!”
What is a butcher’s favorite Elvis Presley song? Love Meat Tenders.
What do you call a group of cows that are on top of a hill? High steaks.
Lately my wife has been looking at me as if I'm a piece of meat....
And it wouldn't bother me, if she wasn't a vegan.
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef!
Some people have to stop telling meat puns, because they simply butcher every single joke.
What’s the best thing about being a butcher? You get to meat the best people.
My doctor told me to cut down on red meat.
So, could you brown it up a bit?
Are you a big fan of beef? I am. In fact, I could eat it until the cows come home.
Why didn't the butcher cross the road? He didn't want to brisket!
If you’re looking for Valentine’s Day inspiration for a meat loving crush, try “Will you beef my Valentine?”
Cows don’t make very good cops. They refuse to go on steak outs.
What did the judge say at the finale of the meat throwing competition? The steaks have never been higher!
What became of the pig who got fired from his job? He became canned ham.
Have you heard about the new meat that’s taking the world by storm? It’s a cross between a cow and a chicken. They call it “roost beef”.
As a butcher, let me advise you never to back up into the meat grinder. It will make you get a little behind in your work.
What type of relationships do hotdogs like to have? A frank relationship, they can’t stand lies.
I met a girl in a vegetarian restaurant who said she recognized me, but I have literally never seen herbivore.
Why did the pig become an actress? Because she was a real ham!
There’s a suspicious email going around, with the subject line “Canned meat.” Don’t open it, it’s spam!
What did the steak say to his enemy? I have a T-bone to pick with you!
It is really rare to find the most perfectly cooked steak.
Why did the butcher work overtime at the grocery store? To make ends meat!
The butcher’s life was at steak when the meat market caught fire.
Vegans really have a beef with meat.
You know I always wanted to open my own sandwich shop. I would have all the meat and bread money could buy...
Problem was I was afraid something would go a rye
Did you see the award-winning movie about a hot dog? It was an Oscar wiener!
Meat cutters are really no good at stand up comedy; they tend to butcher all the best jokes.
Salami get this straight - you don't like meat puns?!
Why did the thief steal a pig? Because he was a hamburglar.
It’s not often that you find an eye anywhere but on the face. Cows, however, have a rib eye.”
What's the name of the meatiest Knight of the Round Table? Sir Loin!
What cut of meat do you get from an extremely tired butcher?
A filet mid-yawn
Pirates used to make a delicious snack for themselves by crossing pate with flowers. They called it “lily livered”.
I love meat. I think going vegetarian would be a big missed steak.
What is the best way to cook alligator meat? With a croc pot!
What's an astronaut's favorite meat? Launch meat!
Which is a meat patty's least favourite day of the week? Fry-day!
What did the skeleton order for lunch? Spare ribs!
What do you call a sausage that's been to the doctor? Cured meat!
What is a cow's favorite deli meat? Bull-ogna!
My friend was totally addicted to the cold meat section in our local supermarket. It got so bad, they had to quit cold turkey.
Why did the cow and the bull become so close? Because they became beef-friends.
What do you call a pig that practices karate? A pork chop!”
