Why did the baker quit making donuts?
Because he was fed up with the hole business!
Ever heard of French Donuts?
They’re the Beigne of my existence.
Why did the donut go to the dentist? It needed a filling!"
The arrogant baker declared, “You’ll never hear a complaint about my doughnuts outside this shop window.”
The customer agreed, “It must be the double glazing.”
Why couldn’t the donut reach enlightenment? Because it was already holy.
What happened to the renegade donuts?
They went down in a glaze of glory.
What is the only thing that can cure a sick do-nut?
An antidought!
Donut even think about taking another donut!
What do you get when you cross Frosty with a baker?
Frosty the Dough-Man!
I allow myself only one donut per year.
This morning I had 433 B.C., 1731, and 1952.
What type of window do donuts prefer in their homes?
Double glazed.
Knock knock!
Who’s there? Doughnut. Doughnut Who? Doughnut forget to close the door!
Why do golfers love donuts?
Always a hole-in-one!
What did the pastry chef say to his unsupportive father?
“Donut hole me back.”
What’s the healthiest part of a donut?
The middle.
What do you call a pastry that is a priest? A Holy Donut!
Why do donuts hate puns so much?
They donut like to joke around!
How can you spot a fashionista donut?
They’re into all the latest glazes.
What do you call a cute donut?
A-dough-able.
Did you hear the joke about the donut? Probably not, it was crummy!
What did an angry donut say to his wife?
Donut talk to me.
Where’s a donut’s favorite vacation spot?
The Sahara dessert!
Knock Knock
Who’s there Justin Justin who? Justin time to make the donuts!
What kind of donuts can fly?
The plain ones.
Why did the donut go to a therapist?
He felt empty inside.
Where was the first donut cooked?
In Greece.
Knock, knock
Who’s there? CIA CIA, who? CI ate your last doughnut!
What are strange donuts made out of?
Weird-doughs.
A cream-filled donut and an eclair decided to get a divorce.
It’s a sad story, but the real victims are their children. They’re in for a grueling custardy battle.
What was the donut’s least favorite part of its day?
I’m not really sure; it glazed over that part.
Why did the donut start going to therapy? It couldn’t get over the feeling that something was missing — it never felt hole!
Which nut is the worst for your diet?
Donuts.
What kind of donuts fly? Plain ones!
What do donuts wear to weddings? Tuxe-doughs!
What do you see when the Pillsbury Doughboy bends over? Doughnuts!
What’s the best thing to put in a donut?
Your teeth.
Why couldn’t the teddy bear finish his donut?
He was stuffed!
Why do donuts make terrible teachers?
They’re always glazing over the important stuff.
What do you call it when you order the same donut every day?
A do-rut!
What’s a donut’s favorite lullaby?
“Sprinkle, Sprinkle Little Star.”
What do you call a Boston creme donut that’s a straight-A student?
The creme of the crop.
Why did the donut go to the doctor?
He was feeling crumby.
What kind of evidence can a donut not take to trial?
Anecdoughtal evidence.
When do bakers stop making donuts?
When they get tired of the hole thing.
What do you call a pastry that is a priest?
A Holy Donut!
How busy was the donuts day? It was jam packed!
What do donuts think about donut puns? They donut like them!
What’s the National Donut Day theme song?
“Donut Stop Believing.”
What did Yoda say when he turned a patron away for ordering a pie?
“Dough. Or doughnut. There is no pie.”
I’m opening a grocery store that specializes in Swiss cheese and donuts.
I’m calling it Hole Foods.