Did you hear about the cheese shop that was destroyed by a tornado?
All that’s left is da brie.
When do they smother a burrito in cheese? In best queso scenario.
What do you call a piece of cheese that likes to shoot hoops? Swiss!
What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho Cheese!
Did you hear about the cheese failed to medal at the olympics? It fell at the final curdle
What do cheese makers dance to on halloween? The muenster mash!
Why couldn’t the cheese sleep?
He was scared there was a munster under the bed.
Which is the Richest Cheese in the world? Paris Stilton.
What is a cheese’s favorite kind of philosophy?
Epistemology and fetaphysics.
What is a cheese lover’s favorite rap artist?
Feta wap.
What did the grilled cheese sandwich say to their date?
“You make me melt.”
Why did the cheese get in trouble?
It was up to no gouda.
What cheese surrounds a medieval castle? Moatzeralla
What is a cheese lover’s favorite Village People song?
Nacho Man.
How do you get a mouse to smile?
Say cheese.
How did the cheese professor start class every day?
Oh queso…
Did you hear about the guy who opened up a store where they only sell Swiss cheese?
It’s a hole business strategy.
What is a lion’s favorite cheese?
Roarquefort.
What did the mom cheese tell the little boy cheese when he got hurt on his bike?
“Gotta take the gouda with the bad.”
What did one cheddar cheese say to the other cheddar cheese at prom?
Looking sharp!
Why doesn't cheddar like to party with crackers? Someone always cuts the cheese.
What do they say when you leave the cheese store?
Have a gouda day!
What do you call a cheese that is an alcoholic? Livarot
What were the cheese’s wedding vows?
To havarti and to hold.
How do you know when a cheese is full of himself?
Whatever you say, he’ll say he is feta.
What do you call it when a cheese goes #2?
Fondue-due.
Why doesn’t anyone like to hang out with crackers?
Someone always cuts the cheese.
What does a cheese say when you ask him to share a secret?
He cantal.
What cheese cries the most?
Babybel.
What hotel do cheese lover’s stay in?
The Stilton.
Did you hear what happened when the decorator painted his wife with cheese? He double Gloucester!
What did the commedian say after after a bad set?
That crowd was laughtose intolerant.
When should you go on a cheese diet? If you need to cheddar a few pounds
What kind of cheese protects a castle?
Moat-zarella.
What kind of cheese makes the best music?
Brieoncé.
When shouldn't you believe a word your cheese is saying? When it's too Gouda to be true.
What kind of cheese do alcoholics eat?
Livarot.
Do you want to hear a pizza joke? Never mind it's too cheesy.
How did the cheese get such curly hair?
It got a permasan.
Did you hear about the guy who had an addiction to cheddar cheese?
It was only mild.
How do you know it’s getting kind of serious with a cheese lover?
They tell you they are pretty fondue you.
Why did the cheese shop owner finally quit the business?
He was tired of the daily rind.
What did the cheese call himself after he got dumped?
Forever provolone.
Which is the most religious cheese? Swiss, because it is holy.
Why did the cheese lover hide cheese in the back of his fridge?
In queso emergency.
What is a cheese lover’s favorite musician?
Mozart-arella.
What cheese should you use to hide a horse? Mascarpone.
What did Shakespeare say as he was making a cheese plate?
To brie or not to brie.
What do you call cheese who attends art openings?
Cultured.
What cheese is made backwards?
Edam.