Why was the slice of bread upset with her husband?
He told her she was being too kneady.
The young loaf of bread ended up getting fired from his job because he kept loafing around. Poor guy.
Young Billy had to mail a loaf of bread at the toast office today.
Did you hear about the sign on the bakery that got everyone talking? It said “I knead dough to live.”
Challah if you see me in the streets. Will do.
What did one bread lover say to the other?
Before I break down and rye, I want you to know that I loaf you.
Why does bread hate hot weather?
It just feels too toasty.
Why was the bread actor so unhappy?
She lost out on a juicy roll.
The young woman decided to become a professional baker. She realized that it could help her earn her bread and butter.
What does bread say to a friend after doing them a favor?
It’s the yeast I could do.
In the 1970s, hippies loved going to a Grateful Dead concert and getting toasted. That’s certainly the truth.
How do you make dog bread? You use collie flour.
I had thought of a lot of good bread puns, but they seem to have gone a rye. I know the feeling.
You better watch out before you play a game with any bread? Baguette ready to lose.
What does a loaf of bread say when breaking up with his girlfriend?
You deserve butter.
The young lady had to throw her toaster in the trash. She was diagnosed as black-toast intolerant.
It’s too bad that bread puns are always so crumby. Mmm . . . crumbs.
That wide loaf has a decent bread-th. Nice.
What’s the worst thing about a bread pun?
It tends to get stale.
I’m a wrapper, so I get a lot of dough. A bread wrapper, that is.
The bread baker won the girl over because he kept giving her a flour. How sweet!
How does bread win over friends?
“You can crust me.”
Do you know why bread hates warm weather? It just makes things too toasty.
The bread did not believe that he could work at his job much longer. He was feeling too crusty.
It’s too bad the man couldn’t quit his job at the bakery. He really kneaded the dough.
"You focaccia bag, crumb back and get it."
Did you hear what happened with the sourdough bread? It really rose to the occasion today.
Why did the butter keep talking? Because he felt like he was really on a roll.
When I tried taking a picture of my bread load, it came out grainy. I think that that is a common problem.
You know why I love bread puns? Because they never go stale.
Why did the baker keep putting too much flour in the bread? Because he was a gluten for punishment.
Did you hear about the secret guild of bakers? They say that they only trade recipes on a knead to know basis.
Why did the aging bread roll retire?
Her career was already toast.
What did one bread say to another after a long day? Don’t worry because tomorrow will be butter.
The cheap baker only paid his employees a flourly rate. Cheapskate!
I don’t want naan of that. Neither do I!
You knead me in your loaf. This one kind of works, but loaf is just a little too different from life.
The mother helped her child bake bread because it was a labor of loaf. True enough.
Thank you for helping me. Biscuit’s the yeast I could do.
"What did the toaster say to the slice of bread?" "I want you inside me!"
How do you make dog bread?
Just use collie flour.
What did the banker want from the baker?
To pump her nickels.
Did you hear about the man who quit his job at a bakery? They said that it left him loathe of bread.
Why was the baker in a serious panic? He thought that he was in a loaf or death situation.
hat’s the most sophisticated kind of bread?
The upper crust.
"Scone be a lot of fun. Wheat love for you to join us."
They say that the local baker is the breadwinner of his family. True enough.
Do you know what you call it when you place beef between two slices of bread? You get a bull-only sandwich.
The baker just felt this incredible knead to make bread. That’s certainly the truth.
Did you hear about the bread party? It’s scone be a lot of fun, and wheat love for you to join us.