“Both optimists and pessimists contribute to our society. The optimist invents the airplane and the pessimist the parachute.”
- Gil Stern
"Once the travel bug bites there is no known antitode, and I know that I shall be happily infected until the end of my life."
- Michael Palin
"Like gum to a shoe, you’re stuck with me and I’m stuck with you."
“Until you’ve learned to drive, you’ve never really learned how to swear.”
— Robert Paul
"Physically I’m here. Mentally I’m in a pool in Bali ordering my third mojito."
“You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine'.”
― Tommy Cooper
“Venice is like eating an entire box of chocolate liqueurs in one go.”
— Truman Capote
"I take my children everywhere, but they always find their way back home."
– Robert Orben
"A road trip is a way for the whole family to spend time together and annoy each other in interesting new places."
– Tom Lichtenheld
"Why do we love the sea? It is because it has some potent power to make us think things we like to think."
- Robert Henri
On Big Ben. “It’s just a big clock? I don’t understand all the hype with this clock. It is literally just a clock. It’s going to be a digital one in thirty years anyway. ”
— Montgomery Smith
"Airplane travel is nature's way of making you look like your passport photo."
- Al Gore
“Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.”
- Douglas Adams
“Any man who can drive safely while kissing a pretty girl is simply not giving the kiss the attention it deserves.”
— Albert Einstein
"There are only two emotions on a plane: boredom and terror."
- Orson Welles
"I’m getting tired of waking up and not being at the beach."
“Never underestimate the therapeutic power of driving and listening to very loud music.”
"Europeans: I drove 40 minutes to spend the weekend in Paris, then popped to Germany to visit family on the way home. Australians: I was in Queensland and drove for 18 hours. Now I’m still in Queensland."
"I need 6 months of vacation. Twice a year."
"Drive slow and enjoy the scenery - drive fast and join the scenery."
- Douglas Horton
"We travel, initially, to lose ourselves, and we travel, next to find ourselves."
- Pico Iyer
“This is the first year I’m not going to Fiji because of COVID-19. Normally, I do not go because I am poor.”
— Brooke Miller
"I don't run a car, have never run a car. I could say that this is because I have this extremely tender environmentalist conscience, but the fact is I hate driving."
- David Attenborough
“The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status, or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we all believe that we are above-average drivers.”
– Dave Barry
“Nascar would be so much more entertaining if they threw banana peels and turtle shells.”
"By 35, if I’m not engaged or already starting a family, I declare myself the aunt who’s always traveling & comes to family events tipsy."
"I haven’t worn these trousers since I bought them. I should definitely pack them for my 3-day vacation. Just in case."
“Forget champagne and caviar – taste the world instead!”
“The worst thing about being a tourist is having other tourists recognize you as a tourist!”
– Russell Baker
"Yeah, working is great… but have you tried traveling?"
“Straight roads are for fast cars, turns are for fast drivers.”
— Colin McRae
“Driving is boring,” Rabbit pontificates, “but it’s what we do. Most of American life is driving somewhere and then driving back wondering why the hell you went.”
– John Updike
"There are good ships
and wood ships
and ships that sail the sea.
But the best ships
are friendships
and may they always be."
“The mud will wash off but the memories will last a lifetime.”
“I have found out that there ain’t no surer way to find out whether you like people or hate them than to travel with them.”
– Mark Twain
“I’m getting used to wearing flip-flops everywhere. It’s a dangerous place to be. Next thing you know, I’m gonna show to a board meeting in sandals.”
"You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive."
“Road Trips: Because they’re cheaper than therapy.”
“Driving at night is about communicating with lights.”
— Lukhman Pambra
"Driving is a spectacular form of amnesia. Everything is to be discovered, everything to be obliterated."
– Jean Baudrillard
“Thanks TSA, I haven’t been touched like that since prom night.”
— Meaghan O’Connell
“The inventor of cobblestones was clearly not communicating with the inventor of luggage wheels.”
"Getting out of bed would be 10x easier if there was a Caribbean ocean and 30 degree weather waiting outside for you."
"People that insist upon drinking and driving, are putting the quart before the hearse."
– Gilbert K. Chesterton
"Family Vacation (n.) A time for you to remember why your family never spends any time together."
“Patience is something you admire in the driver behind you and scorn in the one ahead.”
— Mac McCleary
"Help me! I'm on a family vacation!"
"The pessimist complains about the wind; the optimist expects it to change; the realist adjusts the sails."
- William Arthur Ward
“A car’s weakest part is the nut holding the steering wheel.”
“Life is like pocket money. You shouldn't spend it all in one place.”
― Julian Talbot