“I'm always in a bad mood on Monday morning. It makes me hate everything for no reason whatsoever.”
“What is your favorite day of the week, and why it is your favorite day of the week? Mine is Tuesday because that means Monday is gone.”
“Take a deep breath and try to relax. I promise – Monday will be over soon.”
“We interrupt your happiness to bring you Mondays. Don’t worry, you’re regularly scheduled happiness will resume again on Friday.”
“What is your favorite day of the week, and why it is your favorite day of the week? Mine is Tuesday because that means Monday is gone.”
“Why is Monday so far from Friday? And why is Friday so close to Monday?”
“Hello and welcome to Monday. Do you take sugar, cream, or Valium in your morning coffee?”
“When life gives you Monday, dip it in glitter and sparkle all day.”
“The only certainty in this life is that Monday comes for everyone. A little humor to face at the beginning of the week always goes well. How about starting Monday smiling?”
“Mondays are mundane, like Tuesdays minus 24 hours.”
— Jarod Kintz
“Someone should enact a holiday that honors all people who turn up for work on Mondays.”
“Dear Monday, I want to break up. I’m seeing Tuesday and dreaming about Friday. Sincerely, it’s not me, it’s you.”
“This has been such a Monday! I wish I stayed in bed, and I wish that yesterday had never happened.”
– Lisa Mantchev
“Monday again? Is it every week now?”
“Monday is like a math problem. Add the irritation, subtract the sleep, multiply the problems, divide the happiness.”
“I’ve drank multiple cups of coffee, and Monday isn’t looking any better. Hey – give me a beer. Let’s see if that helps.”
“So. Monday. We meet again. We will never be friends—but maybe we can move past our mutual enmity toward a more-positive partnership.”
— Julio Alexi Genao
“My Week is like: Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Blink, Monday.”
“Monday is almost Tuesday, which is not so far from Wednesday which is neighboring Thursday, and Friday. Enjoy your day!”
“Maybe Monday doesn’t like you either.”
“Monday is great if I can spend it in bed. I’m a man of simple pleasures, really.”
– Arthur Darvill
“If Monday was a gift, I would happily return it to the person who gave it to me.”
“I don’t like Sunday nights because you have to wake up to a Monday morning.”
“If each day is a “gift,” I’d like to know where I can return the Monday.”
“Monday: One of those days when even when your coffee needs a coffee.”
“Never make your favorite song the alarm for Monday morning; you’ll hate it for years.”
“Unfortunately, I did not become a millionaire over the weekend, so I have to return to work on Monday.”
“Roses are red, Mondays are hard. I’m not good at poetry. COFFEE.”
“Monday is a sloppy umbrella day, which makes everybody a little blue.”
– George Leedy
“I don’t like when I'm all stress-free and peacefully relaxing on the couch and then, out of nowhere, Monday comes along and punches you right off the couch!”
“SMONDAY: The moment when Sunday stops feeling like a Sunday and the anxiety of Monday kicks in.”
“Enjoy every second of Sunday, for when you least expect Monday comes to haunt you.”
“Is it Monday already? I’m almost positive I did not get my entire portion of the weekend.”
“Dear Monday, my mama doesn’t like you and she likes everyone.”
“It’s just another manic Monday. I wish it was Sunday. ‘Cause, that’s my fun day. My, I don’t have to run day.”
— Prince Rogers Nelson
“Mondays are a lot like getting fat. They make you feel sad, sometimes angry and there is not much scope for liking either fat or Mondays for any reason.”
– Garry Moll
“If Monday were a person, it would be a boring friend who always forces us to do what we don’t want.”
“If I was elected president, the first thing I would do would be to eliminate all Mondays and lengthen the weekend one more day.”
“Monday, you're so jealous of my relationship with Sunday because I am so happy to see you leave!”
“Hello, Monday! May I ask you a question? Why are you always back so quickly? Don’t you have a hobby?”
“Sunday morning my head is bad. But it's worth all the time I had. But I've got to go and get some rest. For Monday is a mess!”
– Dave Bartholomew, Blue Monday
“Monday I shall slay thee with my mighty cup of coffee.”
“May your coffee be strong and your Monday productive.”
“Keep calm and pretend it’s not Monday.”
“The worst moment today has happened. That was when the alarm went off and I realized it was Monday.”
“Dear Mondays, I really think that you should take a holiday. Believe me, no one will even miss you.”
“Due to lack of interest. Monday has been canceled.”
“Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7th of your life!”
“May your coffee be extra strong, and your Monday be extra short.”
“Monday: nothing a bit of shopping can’t fix.”
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