“When it comes to staying young, a mind-lift beats a face-lift any day.” – Marty Buccella
"Men do not quit playing because they grow old—they grow old because they quit playing." - Oliver Wendell Holmes
"Wisdom doesn’t necessarily come with age. Sometimes, age just shows up all by itself." - Tom Wilson
""Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest." - Larry Lorenzoni
"It is better to wear out than to rust out." - Bishop Richard Cumberland
“Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest.” - Larry Lorenzon
"Nobody expects to trust his body much after the age of fifty." - Alexander Hamilton
“By the time you’re 80 years old you’ve learned everything. You only have to remember it.” - George Burns
"At my age, flowers scare me." - George Burns
"I’m at that age where my back goes out more than I do." - Phyllis Diller
"The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for." - Will Rogers
"Age is something that doesn’t matter, unless you are a cheese." – Billie Burke
"Nice to be here? At my age it’s nice to be anywhere." – George Burns
"Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen." - Mark Twain
"Old age is when you resent the swimsuit issue of Sports Illustrated because there are fewer articles to read." – George Burns
"Getting older. I used to be able to run a 4-minute mile, bench press 380 pounds, and tell the truth." - Conan O’Brien
"As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two." - Sir Norman Wisdom
"I can honestly say I love getting older. Then again, I never put my glasses on before looking in the mirror." - Cherie Lunghi
"Old age is always fifteen years older than I am." - Oliver Wendell Holmes
"Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician." - Anonymous
"People ask me what I’d most appreciate getting for my eighty-seventh birthday. I tell them, a paternity suit." - George Burns
"There’s one advantage to being 102, there’s no peer pressure." - Dennis Wolfberg
"I didn’t get old on purpose, it just happened. If you’re lucky, it could happen to you." – Andy Ronney
“You spend 90 percent of your adult life hoping for a long rest and the last 10 percent trying to convince the Lord that you’re actually not that tired.” – Robert Brault
"At my age ‘getting lucky’ means walking into a room and remembering what I came in for." - Unknown
"Children are a great comfort in your old age, and they help you reach it faster, too." – Lionel Kauffman
"We must both, I’m afraid, recognise that, as we grow older, we become like old cars – more and more repairs and replacements are necessary." - C.S. Lewis
“The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.”—Lucille Ball
"If you want to know how old a woman is then ask her sister-in-law." - Edgar Howe
"There is still no cure for the common birthday." - John Glenn
"Gray hair is God’s graffiti." – Bill Cosby
"At fifty, everyone has the face he deserves." - George Orwell
"I’m so old that my blood type is discontinued." - Bill Dane
"Regrets are the natural property of grey hairs." - Charles Dickens
"When I was young, I was called a rugged individualist. When I was in my fifties, I was considered eccentric. Here I am doing and saying the same things I did then, and I’m labeled senile." - George Burns
“Aging seems to be the only available way to live a long life.” - Kitty O’Neill Collins
"There are three stages of man: he believes in Santa Claus, he does not believe in Santa Claus, he is Santa Claus." - Bob Phillips
“You know you’re getting old when you stoop to tie your shoelaces and wonder what else you could do while you’re down there.” - George Burns
"At age 20, we worry about what others think of us… at age 40, we don’t care what they think of us… at age 60, we discover they haven’t been thinking of us at all." - Ann Landers
"I have reached an age when, if someone tells me to wear socks, I don’t have to." - Albert Einstein
“Old people shouldn’t eat health foods. They need all the preservatives they can get.” – Robert Orben
"You know you’re getting old when you can pinch an inch on your forehead." - John Mendoza
“It’s like you trade the virility of the body for the agility of the spirit.” – Elizabeth Lesser
“Old age is an excellent time for outrage. My goal is to say or do at least one outrageous thing every week.” - Maggie Kuhn
"There’s a reason why forty, fifty, and sixty don’t look the way they used to and it’s not because of feminism, or better living through exercise. It’s because of hair dye." Nora Ephron
“It’s paradoxical that the idea of living a long life appeals to everyone, but the idea of getting old doesn’t appeal to anyone.” - Andy Rooney
"The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume control also turns to the left. - Jerry M. Wright
"Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act." - Truman Capote
"You know you are getting old when everything either dries up or leaks." - Joel Plaskett
"Grandchildren don’t make a man feel old, it’s the knowledge that he’s married to a grandmother that does." - J. Norman Collie