“All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt.”
― Charles M. Schulz
“I eat cake every day because somewhere out there it’s someone’s birthday and I like to celebrate.”
― Unknown
“Stomach: I will now demonstrate a blue whale’s mating call.”
― Unknown
“The key to my heart looks a whole lot like a plate of pasta.”
― Unknown
"The trouble with eating Italian food is that five or six days later, you're hungry again."
— George Miller
“Abs are temporary. Chocolate is forever.”
― Unknown
“I want to tell you about the "sausage principle." The theory says, "If you love something, never try to find out how it is done."”
― Unknown
"I was a vegetarian until I started leaning toward the sunlight."
– Rita Rudner
“When life hands you lemons, give them back. You deserve chocolate.”
― Unknown
"A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand."
— Barbara Johnson
“A pizza slice a day keeps sadness away.”
― Jet Paacal
"If more of us valued food and cheer and song above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world."
– J.R.R. Tolkien
“My mind says ‘abs’ but my heart says ‘cheese fries’.”
― Unknown
“I’m glad I don’t have to hunt my own food, I don’t even know where sandwiches live.”
― Unknown
"Life expectancy would grow by leaps and bounds if green vegetables smelled as good as bacon."
— Doug Larson
"I'm not sure how the average American would differentiate National Dessert Day from any other day."
– Andy Borowitz
"Do you know what breakfast cereal is made of? It's made of all those little curly wooden shavings you find in pencil sharpeners!"
— Roald Dahl
“Don’t believe everything fortune cookies tell you. Just because they’re sweet doesn’t mean they’re right.”
― Unknown
"The trouble with eating Italian food is that, five or six days later, you're hungry again."
– George Miller
“Being a beaver is nice, if you’re hungry you just eat a piece of your home.”
― Unknown
"I always cook with wine. Sometimes I even add it to the food."
— W.C. Fields
“I won’t be impressed with technology until I can download food.”
― Unknown
“You can’t make everyone happy. You’re not pizza.”
― Unknown
"All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt."
— Charles M. Shulz
"An onion can make people cry but there's never been a vegetable that can make people laugh."
— Will Rogers
"I'm not sure what makes pepperoni so good if it's the pepper or the oni."
— Ulrik Stephens
“Everything goes better with tacos.”
― Rachel Caine
"I don't share blame. I don't share credit. And I don't share desserts"
– Beverly Sills
"The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd rather not."
— Mark Twain
"My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four. Unless there are three other people."
— Orson Welles
"Popcorn for breakfast! Why not? It’s a grain. It’s like, like, grits, but with high self-esteem."
– James Patterson
"There's no better feeling in the world than a warm pizza box on your lap."
— Kevin James
"I'll have a double cappuccino, half-caf, non-fat milk, with enough foam to be aesthetically pleasing, but not so much that it would leave a mustache."
— Niles Crane
“I didn’t get this physique by not eating tacos.”
― Jon Tester
"The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for thirty years she served the family nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found."
— Calvin Trillin
“Those pizzas I ate were for medicinal purposes.”
― Amy Neftzger
"I really don't think I need buns of steel. I'd be happy with buns of cinnamon."
— Ellen DeGeneres
"Vegetables are a must on a diet. I suggest carrot cake, zucchini bread, and pumpkin pie."
— Jim Davis
"Never order barbecue in a place that also serves quiche."
— Lewis Grizzard
"When the waitress asked if I wanted my pizza cut into four or eight slices, I said, 'Four. I don't think I can eat eight."
— Yogi Berra
"The 12-step chocoholics program: Never be more than 12 steps away from chocolate!"
— Terry Moore
“I thought about losing weight once, but I don’t like losing.”
― Unknown
“The only clubs I’m interested in are sandwiches.”
― Unknown
"Snack time heals all wounds."
— Bridger Winegar
“I always carry a knife in my purse, just in case we’re having cake.”
― Unknown
“Where there is cake, there is hope. And there is always cake.”
― Dean Koontz
“Nutrition labels should include a “What if I ate the whole thing” section.”
― Unknown
"The only time to eat diet food is while you're waiting for the steak to cook."
— Julia Child
"If we shake out all of the crumbs from all of the keyboards in the world, we can end world hunger."
— Matthew Dolkart
“Every pizza is a personal pizza if you try hard and believe in yourself.”
― Bill Murray
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