“I figured out why Uncle Sam wears such a tall hat. It comes in handy when he passes it around.”
— Soupy Sales
"The income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has."
- Will Rogers
“They can't collect legal taxes from illegal money."
— Al Capone
"A tax is a fine for doing well, a fine is a tax for doing wrong."
— Mark Twain
“I’m spending a year dead for tax reasons.”
— Douglas Adams
“The U.S. Senate is considering a bill that would tax Botox. When Botox users heard this, they were horrified. Well, I think they were horrified. It’s difficult to tell.”
— Craig Ferguson
"The only difference between a tax man and a taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin."
- Mark Twain
“The best things in life are free, but sooner or later the government will find a way to tax them.”
"A tax cut to compensate for a tax increase is not a cut — it's a con."
— Tony Abbott
"Unquestionably, there is progress. The average American now pays out twice as much in taxes as he formerly got in wages."
- H. L. Mencken
“The trouble with the IRS is that 90% of its members give the rest a bad name.”
“I love America, but I can’t spend the whole year here. I can’t afford the taxes.”
— Mick Jagger
“It's easy to find out who is going to become a tax collector. In the nursery, give all the kids lemons. The one who squeezes it dry is going to work for the IRS.”
"You don't pay taxes ― they take taxes."
― Chris Rock
“Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars and a substantial tax cut save you thirty cents?”
– Peg Bracken
