"A stupid person laughs three times at a joke; once when everyone else is laughing, a second time when he actually gets the joke, and a third time when he realizes he was laughing without getting the joke at first."
“Genius may have its limitations, but stupidity is not thus handicapped.”
- Elbert Hubbard
“I love Mickey Mouse more than any woman I have ever known.”
- Walt Disney
“Every man is a d*** fool for at least five minutes every day; wisdom consists in not exceeding the limit.”
― Elbert Hubbard
"Technology is getting smarter and smarter: smartphones, smartwatches, smart homes… Only people remain stupid no matter what."
- Anna LeMind
"I am so clever that sometimes I don’t understand a single word of what I am saying."
- Oscar Wilde
"You have no reason to fear zombies, do you?"
Anonymous
"I prefer not to think before speaking. I like being as surprised as everyone else by what comes out of my mouth."
Anonymous
“Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.”
- George Benard Shaw
“My sister’s expecting a baby, and I don’t know if I’m going to be an uncle or an aunt.”
- Chuck Nevitt
“But the fact that some geniuses were laughed at does not imply that all who are laughed at are geniuses. They laughed at Columbus, they laughed at Fulton, they laughed at the Wright Brothers. But they also laughed at Bozo the Clown.”
- Carl Sagan
"Ignorance is a form of environmental pollution."
Anonymous
"Don’t worry about what other people think. They don’t do it very often."
Anonymous
“The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity.”
Anonymous
“Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.”
- Alan Dundes
“Arguing with a fool proves there are two.”
– Doris M. Smith
“The learned fool writes his nonsense in better language than the unlearned, but still ‘this nonsense.”
– Benjamin Franklin
"The first thing you learn in life is you’re a fool. The last thing you learn in life is you’re the same fool."
Anonymous
"Wise men speak because they have something to say; fools because they have to say something."
- Plato
“Think of how stupid the average person is and realize half of them are stupider than that.”
– George Carlin
“If being awesome was a crime, I would be serving a life sentence.”
Anonymous
“No matter how smart you are, you can never convince someone stupid that they are stupid.”
Anonymous
“What is the only flaw of being intelligent?…that you have to deal with stupid people.”
Anonymous
"One man alone can be pretty dumb sometimes, but for real bona fide stupidity, nothin' can beat teamwork."
- Edward Abbey
"Common sense is not a gift. It’s a punishment because you have to deal with everyone who doesn’t have it."
Anonymous
"A clever person takes notice of everything; a stupid one makes a comment about everything."
- Heinrich Heine
"Stupid is when you spend 18 hours trying to drown a fish."
Anonymous
“A stupid man’s report of what a clever man says can never be accurate because he unconsciously translates what he hears into something he can understand.”
- Bertrand Russell
"The dumbest people I know are those who Know It All."
– Malcolm Forbes
"If I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a million times: Don’t exaggerate!"
Anonymous
“When a stupid man is doing something, he is ashamed of, he always declares that it is his duty.”
- George Bernard Shaw
“Mix a little foolishness with your serious plans. It is lovely to be silly at the right moment.”
- Horace
"Stupidity has a knack of getting its way."
- Albert Camus
“It’s so simple to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and then don’t say it.”
“Scientists say the world is made of protons, neutrons, and electrons. they forgot to mention morons.”
Anonymous
"I am allergic to stupidity, so I break out in sarcasm."
Anonymous
“My biggest fear about becoming a zombie is all the walking that I’d have to do.”
“The downside of playing dumb is that you sound dumb.”
- Rachel Maddow
"If ignorance is bliss, there should be more happy people."
- Victor Cousin
“The problem with the world is that everyone does not have a brain, but everyone does have a tongue.”
- Raheel Farooq
"Common sense is like deodorant. The people who need it most never use it."
Anonymous
“There are much easier things in life than finding a good man. Nailing Jell-O to a tree, for instance.”
Anonymous
"Better to keep silent and let people think you are a fool than to open your mouth and remove all doubt."
- Abraham Lincoln
“Better a witty fool than a foolish wit.”
– William Shakespeare
“Seriousness is stupidity sent to college.”
- P. J. O’Rourke
“Whenever a man does a thoroughly stupid thing, it is always from the noblest motives.”
- Oscar Wilde
"It is the dull man who is always sure and the sure man who is always dull."
— H.L. Mencken
“Stupid people will mistake your confidence for arrogance.”
- Habeeb Akande
“Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.”
- Mark Twain
“Make yourself look really stupid so you don’t feel bad doing something a little stupid.”
- Mark Hoppus