“When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water.”
“I didn’t fail the test. I just found 100 ways to do it wrong.”
– Benjamin Franklin
“The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept.”
— George Carlin
"Whatever you do, always give 100%. Unless you’re donating blood."
— Bill Murray
“People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing—that’s why we recommend it daily.”
— Zig Ziglar
“If you’re searching for that one person that will change your life, take a look in the mirror.”
“I have an everyday religion that works for me. Love yourself first, and everything else falls into line.”
– Lucille Ball
“Not everybody has to love me. I can’t force you to have good taste.”
“Don’t worry if people think you’re crazy. You are crazy. You have that kind of intoxicating insanity that lets other people dream outside of the lines and become who they’re destined to be.”
— Jennifer Elisabeth
“The road to success is always under construction.”
"Resting is a part of the process, even if it’s not a part of the plan."
— Carley Schweet
“Life is a shipwreck but we must not forget to sing in the lifeboats.”
“Self-love seems so often unrequited.”
– Anthony Powell
“If you think you are too small to be effective, you have never been in the dark with a mosquito.”
– Betty Reese
"I’m so hot that I contribute to global warming."
“Bad decisions make good stories.”
– Ellis Vidler
“I am the only person in the world I should like to know thoroughly.”
– Oscar Wilde
“The bags under my eyes are Prada.”
"I’m staying home today. I have mood poisoning."
"Listen, smile, agree, and then do whatever you were gonna do anyway."
― Robert Downey Jr.
"I’m too busy working on my own grass to notice if yours is greener."
"It’s a funny thing about life, once you begin to take note of the things you are grateful for, you begin to lose sight of the things that you lack."
― Germany Kent
“When I hear somebody sigh, “Life is hard”, I am always tempted to ask, “Compared to what?””
– Sydney Harris
“Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and it may be necessary from time to time to give a stupid or misinformed beholder a black eye.”
— Jim Henson
"Know your worth, and then make sure to add tax."
“We must fall in love with yourselves. I don’t like myself. I’m crazy about myself.”
– Mae West
“Being different is a revolving door in your life where secure people enter and insecure exit.”
— Shannon L. Alder
"Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else."
― Margaret Mead
"People who wonder if the glass is half full or half empty miss the point. The glass is refillable."
“Stretch marks are just rad lil’ lightning strikes here to remind you that you are a force of nature.”
“When you realize your self-worth you’ll stop giving people discounts.”
"I am not an early bird or night owl; I’m some sort of permanently exhausted pigeon."
"I give myself sometimes admirable advice, but I am incapable of taking it."
― Mary Wortley Montagu
"Self-care is giving the world the best of you instead of what’s left of you."
— Katie Reed
"Don’t forget to drink water and get some sun. You’re basically a houseplant with more complicated emotions."
"The elevator to success is out of order. You’ll have to use the stairs, one step at a time."
― Joe Girard
“If you’re going through hell, keep going.”
— Winston Churchill
"If you don’t have wrinkles, you haven’t laughed enough."
― Phyllis Diller
"They say good things take time, so that’s why I’m always late."
“Don’t worry about the world coming to an end today. It is already tomorrow in Australia.”
– Charles Schulz
"Almost everything will work again if you unplug it for a few minutes, including yourself."
— Anne Lamott
"Sometimes you just need to lie on the couch and read for a couple of years."
“A diamond is merely a lump of coal that did well under pressure.”
“Failure is the condiment that gives success its flavor.”
― Truman Capote
"If it costs you your peace of mind, you’ve overpaid."
— Rigel J. Dawson
"I’m so cool that even ice cubes are jealous."
“Sorry, I can’t hear you over the sound of how awesome I am.”
— Harvey Specter
“The road to success is always under construction.”
"Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive."
― Elbert Hubbard
“Let’s begin by taking a smallish nap or two.”
– A. A. Milne (Winnie the Pooh)