“Money is like manure. You have to spread it around or it smells." ~J. Paul Getty
“A bargain is something you can’t use at a price you can’t resist.”- Franklin Jones.
“Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks.” — Steven Wright
“I have enough money to last me the rest of my life, unless I buy something.” -Jackie Mason“I have enough money to last me the rest of my life, unless I buy something.” -Jackie Mason
“What’s worth doing is worth doing for money.” –Gordon Gekko (Michael Douglas) Wall Street
“I just filled out my income tax forms. Who says you can’t get killed by a blank?” — Milton Berle
“The best way you hurt rich people is by turning them into poor people” – Billy Ray Valentine (Eddie Murphy) Trading Places
"Why is there so much month left at the end of the money?" ~ John Barrymore
“What’s the use of happiness? It can’t buy you money." ~ Henny Youngman
“What is the difference between a taxidermist and a tax collector? The taxidermist takes only your skin” –Mark Twain
“I finally know what distinguishes man from other beasts: financial worries.” – Jules Renard
“It doesn’t matter how low the dollar will go, I will always bend down and pick it up.” ~ Anonymous
"Staying in bed all day is my way of saving money." ~ Anonymous
“If you lend someone $20, and never see that person again, it was probably worth it." ~Author Unknown
“When I was young I thought money was the most important thing in life; now that I’m old, I know it is." ~ Oscar Wilde
“Saving is a very fine thing. Especially when your parents have done it for you.” – Winston Churchill
“They were a people so primitive they did not know how to get money, except by working for it.” Joseph Addison.
“Always borrow money from a pessimist, he doesn’t expect to be paid back." ~Author Unknown
“Money is not the most important thing in the world. Love is. Fortunately, I love money.” – Jackie Mason
“You fool! You’re 30 cents away from having a quarter!” –Sweet Dick Willie (Robin Harris)Do the Right Thing
“What’s the use of happiness? It can’t buy you money.”- Henry Youngman
“Blessed are the young, for they shall inherit the national debt." ~ Herbert Hoover
“The safest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it in your pocket.” – Kin Hubbard
“Money’s only something you need in case you don’t die tomorrow.” – Carl Fox (Martin Sheen)Wall Street
"Money doesn’t change you. It reveals who you are when you no longer have to be nice." ~ Tim Ferriss
“Carpe per diem – seize the check.” – Robin Williams.
“A fool and his money are lucky enough to get together in the first place.” — Gordon Gekko (Michael Douglas) Wall Street
"It’s easy to meet expenses, everywhere we go, there they are." ~ Anonymus
“If you owe the bank $100 that’s your problem. If you owe the bank $100 million, that’s the bank’s problem.” -JP Getty.
“The only reason I made a commercial for American Express was to pay for my American Express bill.” Peter Ustinov.
“Money can’t buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery." ~ Spike Milligan
“The economy depends about as much on economists as the weather does on weather forecasters." ~Jean-Paul Kauffmann
"I despise the lottery. There’s less chance of you becoming a millionaire than there is of getting hit by a passing asteroid." ~ Unknown
"Whoever said money can’t buy happiness didn’t know where to go shopping." ~ Bo Derek
“I’m so poor I can’t even pay attention." ~Ron Kittle
“He who marries for love without money has good nights and sorry days.” – Anonymous
"Car sickness is the feeling you get when the monthly payment is due." ~Author Unknown
"They were a people so primitive they did not know how to get money, except by working for it." ~ Joseph Addison
“If you pay peanuts, you get monkeys” – James Goldsmith
“If there is anyone to whom I owe money, I’m prepared to forget it if they are.” - Errol Flynn
“I’m spending a year dead for tax reasons.” Douglas Adams.
“People say money is not the key to happiness, but I have always figured if you have enough money, you can have a key made.”—Joan Rivers
"There is a very easy way to return from a casino with a small fortune: go there with a large one." ~ Jack Yelton
“Money isn’t everything but it sure keeps you in touch with your children." ~ J. Paul Getty
"Don’t stay in bed unless you make money in bed." ~ George Burns
“Money can’t buy happiness, but it can buy you the kind of misery you prefer." ~Author Unknown
"Most people work just hard enough to not get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit." ~ George Carline
“There are two times in a man’s life when he should not speculate: when he can’t afford it, and when he can.” – Mark Twain
“Money is the opposite of the weather. Nobody talks about it, but everybody does something about it.” – Rebecca Johnson
"Money is like a sixth sense – and you can’t make use of the other five without it." ~ William Somerset Maugham