"If you can count your money, you don’t have a billion dollars." ~ J. Paul Getty
“Money is like manure. You have to spread it around or it smells." ~J. Paul Getty
"The safe way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it in your pocket." ~ Kin Hubbard
“Undermine the entire economic structure of society by leaving the pay toilet door ajar so the next person can get in free.” - Taylor Meade
“The best way you hurt rich people is by turning them into poor people” – Billy Ray Valentine (Eddie Murphy) Trading Places
“If you want to know what God thinks of money, look at the people he gave it to.” —Dorothy Parker
“There are two times in a man’s life when he should not speculate: when he can’t afford it, and when he can.” – Mark Twain
“It doesn’t matter how low the dollar will go, I will always bend down and pick it up.” ~ Anonymous
“People are living longer than ever before, a phenomenon undoubtedly made necessary by the 30-year mortgage." ~Doug Larson
“To make a million, start with $900,000.” - Morton Shulman.
“Money is something you have to make in case you don’t die.” Max Asnas.
“He who marries for love without money has good nights and sorry days.” – Anonymous
“Money isn’t everything but it sure keeps you in touch with your children." ~ J. Paul Getty
“Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair." ~Sam Ewing
"Money doesn’t change you. It reveals who you are when you no longer have to be nice." ~ Tim Ferriss
“If there is a WILL, there are 500 relatives.” – Anonymous
“People say money is not the key to happiness, but I have always figured if you have enough money, you can have a key made.”—Joan Rivers
"Staying in bed all day is my way of saving money." ~ Anonymous
“Money can’t buy happiness, but it can buy beer." ~ Gary Reilly
“If you think money doesn’t grow on trees, you ain’t checking every limb.” – Chamillionaire
“I’m so naive about finances. Once my mother mentioned an amount and I realized I didn’t understand, she had to explain, ‘That’s like three Mercedes.’ Then I understood.” – Brooke Shields
“It’s money. I remember it from when I was single” — Billy Crystal
“Money’s only something you need in case you don’t die tomorrow." ~ Martin Sheen
“This would be a much better world if more married couples were as deeply in love as they are in debt” – Earl Wilson
"Who is rich? He that is content. Who is that? Nobody.” ~ Benjamin Franklin
“If women didn’t exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning." ~Aristotle Onassis