“Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7th of your life!”
“I really don’t play well with others on a Monday. Can I skip today and just start again with Tuesday?”
“Why is Monday so far from Friday? And why is Friday so close to Monday?”
“Roses are red, Mondays are hard. I’m not good at poetry. COFFEE.”
“I hate mornings and Mondays. And working. But other than that I am entirely happy.”
“Take a deep breath and try to relax. I promise – Monday will be over soon.”
“If Monday was a gift, I would happily return it to the person who gave it to me.”
“I'm always in a bad mood on Monday morning. It makes me hate everything for no reason whatsoever.”
“At the end of a rainbow, there’s a pot of gold. But when the weekend comes to an end, there’s only a Monday.”
“Dear Monday, I want to break up. I’m seeing Tuesday and dreaming about Friday. Sincerely, it’s not me, it’s you.”
“Monday should be optional.”
“Someone should enact a holiday that honors all people who turn up for work on Mondays.”
“When life gives you Monday, dip it in glitter and sparkle all day.”
“May your coffee be extra strong, and your Monday be extra short.”
“It’s just another manic Monday. I wish it was Sunday. ‘Cause, that’s my fun day. My, I don’t have to run day.”
— Prince Rogers Nelson
“Monday, you're so jealous of my relationship with Sunday because I am so happy to see you leave!”
“Unfortunately, I did not become a millionaire over the weekend, so I have to return to work on Monday.”
“Dear Mondays, I really think that you should take a holiday. Believe me, no one will even miss you.”
“Good morning. Keep calm and pretend it’s not Monday.”
“I’ve drank multiple cups of coffee, and Monday isn’t looking any better. Hey – give me a beer. Let’s see if that helps.”
“The only certainty in this life is that Monday comes for everyone. A little humor to face at the beginning of the week always goes well. How about starting Monday smiling?”
“My Week is like: Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Blink, Monday.”
“So. Monday. We meet again. We will never be friends—but maybe we can move past our mutual enmity toward a more-positive partnership.”
— Julio Alexi Genao
“Monday: One of those days when even when your coffee needs a coffee.”
“Keep calm and pretend it’s not Monday.”
“If I was elected president, the first thing I would do would be to eliminate all Mondays and lengthen the weekend one more day.”
“The worst moment today has happened. That was when the alarm went off and I realized it was Monday.”
“What is your favorite day of the week, and why it is your favorite day of the week? Mine is Tuesday because that means Monday is gone.”
“Monday: nothing a bit of shopping can’t fix.”
“Hello and welcome to Monday. Do you take sugar, cream, or Valium in your morning coffee?”
“Monday is a sloppy umbrella day, which makes everybody a little blue.”
– George Leedy
“Dear Monday, my mama doesn’t like you and she likes everyone.”
“Mondays are a lot like getting fat. They make you feel sad, sometimes angry and there is not much scope for liking either fat or Mondays for any reason.”
– Garry Moll
“Never make your favorite song the alarm for Monday morning; you’ll hate it for years.”
“So. Monday. We meet again. We will never be friends — but maybe we can move past our mutual enmity toward a more positive partnership.”
“Monday I shall slay thee with my mighty cup of coffee.”
“Set your clocks at the start of the weekend so that you know just how much fun time you get to have. Then smash your clocks so you won't know when Monday starts.”
“Mondays are mundane, like Tuesdays minus 24 hours.”
— Jarod Kintz
“I don’t like Sunday nights because you have to wake up to a Monday morning.”
“What is your favorite day of the week, and why it is your favorite day of the week? Mine is Tuesday because that means Monday is gone.”
“Monday again? Is it every week now?”
“Enjoy every second of Sunday, for when you least expect Monday comes to haunt you.”
“Monday is great if I can spend it in bed. I’m a man of simple pleasures, really.”
– Arthur Darvill
“Sunday morning my head is bad. But it's worth all the time I had. But I've got to go and get some rest. For Monday is a mess!”
– Dave Bartholomew, Blue Monday
“Hello, Monday! May I ask you a question? Why are you always back so quickly? Don’t you have a hobby?”
“Is it Monday already? I’m almost positive I did not get my entire portion of the weekend.”
“This is the mondayest Monday that ever mondayed.”
“This has been such a Monday! I wish I stayed in bed, and I wish that yesterday had never happened.”
– Lisa Mantchev
“Candy is nature’s way of making up for Mondays.”
— Rebecca Gober
“If Monday were a person, it would be a boring friend who always forces us to do what we don’t want.”