“Hello, Monday! May I ask you a question? Why are you always back so quickly? Don’t you have a hobby?”
“Monday I shall slay thee with my mighty cup of coffee.”
“I really don’t play well with others on a Monday. Can I skip today and just start again with Tuesday?”
“When life gives you Monday, dip it in glitter and sparkle all day.”
“Dear Mondays, I really think that you should take a holiday. Believe me, no one will even miss you.”
“If Monday was a gift, I would happily return it to the person who gave it to me.”
“I really need a day in-between Sunday and Monday.”
“So. Monday. We meet again. We will never be friends—but maybe we can move past our mutual enmity toward a more-positive partnership.”
— Julio Alexi Genao
“At the end of a rainbow, there’s a pot of gold. But when the weekend comes to an end, there’s only a Monday.”
“Never make your favorite song the alarm for Monday morning; you’ll hate it for years.”
“Monday is great if I can spend it in bed. I’m a man of simple pleasures, really.”
– Arthur Darvill
“Sunday morning my head is bad. But it's worth all the time I had. But I've got to go and get some rest. For Monday is a mess!”
– Dave Bartholomew, Blue Monday
“If Monday were a person, it would be a boring friend who always forces us to do what we don’t want.”
“What is your favorite day of the week, and why it is your favorite day of the week? Mine is Tuesday because that means Monday is gone.”
“I'm always in a bad mood on Monday morning. It makes me hate everything for no reason whatsoever.”
“Monday again? Is it every week now?”
“Dear Monday, my mama doesn’t like you and she likes everyone.”
“Candy is nature’s way of making up for Mondays.”
— Rebecca Gober
“Monday is a sloppy umbrella day, which makes everybody a little blue.”
– George Leedy
“So. Monday. We meet again. We will never be friends — but maybe we can move past our mutual enmity toward a more positive partnership.”
“Monday is like a math problem. Add the irritation, subtract the sleep, multiply the problems, divide the happiness.”
“Enjoy every second of Sunday, for when you least expect Monday comes to haunt you.”
“This is the mondayest Monday that ever mondayed.”
“The only certainty in this life is that Monday comes for everyone. A little humor to face at the beginning of the week always goes well. How about starting Monday smiling?”
“What is your favorite day of the week, and why it is your favorite day of the week? Mine is Tuesday because that means Monday is gone.”
“Monday is almost Tuesday, which is not so far from Wednesday which is neighboring Thursday, and Friday. Enjoy your day!”
“Monday should be optional.”
“I’ve drank multiple cups of coffee, and Monday isn’t looking any better. Hey – give me a beer. Let’s see if that helps.”
“If I was elected president, the first thing I would do would be to eliminate all Mondays and lengthen the weekend one more day.”
“I don’t like Sunday nights because you have to wake up to a Monday morning.”
“Due to lack of interest. Monday has been canceled.”
“Take a deep breath and try to relax. I promise – Monday will be over soon.”
“Mondays are mundane, like Tuesdays minus 24 hours.”
— Jarod Kintz
“May your coffee be strong and your Monday productive.”
“Monday: nothing a bit of shopping can’t fix.”
“Why is Monday so far from Friday? And why is Friday so close to Monday?”
“Monday, you're so jealous of my relationship with Sunday because I am so happy to see you leave!”
“Mondays are a lot like getting fat. They make you feel sad, sometimes angry and there is not much scope for liking either fat or Mondays for any reason.”
– Garry Moll
“Roses are red, Mondays are hard. I’m not good at poetry. COFFEE.”
“We interrupt your happiness to bring you Mondays. Don’t worry, you’re regularly scheduled happiness will resume again on Friday.”
“Maybe Monday doesn’t like you either.”
“Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7th of your life!”
“This has been such a Monday! I wish I stayed in bed, and I wish that yesterday had never happened.”
– Lisa Mantchev
“I don’t like when I'm all stress-free and peacefully relaxing on the couch and then, out of nowhere, Monday comes along and punches you right off the couch!”
“Monday: One of those days when even when your coffee needs a coffee.”
“Keep calm and pretend it’s not Monday.”
“The worst moment today has happened. That was when the alarm went off and I realized it was Monday.”
“Is it Monday already? I’m almost positive I did not get my entire portion of the weekend.”
“My Week is like: Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Blink, Monday.”
“Someone should enact a holiday that honors all people who turn up for work on Mondays.”