"I can't believe we got grades in gym class. I've never used anything I learned in there."
- Jim Gaffigan
"How sickness enlarges the dimension of a man's self to himself!"- Charles Lamb
"Warning... I'm exercising, eating right and watching my alcohol intake... which means I'm sober, I'm cranky and I'm sore, so proceed with caution!"
"I can sympathize with people's pains but not with their pleasures. There is something curiously boring about somebody else's happiness." - Aldous Huxley
“I am convinced digestion is the great secret to life.”
Sydney Smith
"Avoid any diet that discourages the use of hot fudge"- Don Kardong
"If you want to know the correct way to perform an exercise, the answer is: Whatever hurts most."
- Jason Love.
"Fitness: If it came in a bottle, everyone would have a great body."
- Cher.
“It’s bizarre that the [grocery store] produce manager is more important to my children’s health than the pediatrician.”
Unknown
"Doctors are always working to preserve our health and cooks to destroy it, but the latter are the more often successful." - Denis Diderot
“Anorexia is a disease not a fashion statement.”
Brooke
"You ever look for the remote control, but you can't find it, so you just decide, 'Ah, guess I'm not watching TV. I'm not gonna take two steps and turn it on myself. I'll go to the gym if I'm going to work out.'"
- Jim Gaffigan.
"Health is merely the slowest way someone can die."
"The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd druther not." - Mark Twain
"Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do practice?" —George Carlin
"If your doctor's last name is Google, it's time to get a second opinion…" - Toni Bernhard, J.D.
"I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol."- Steven Write
"Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing." —Redd Foxx
"I don't get why people pay to exercise in a gym when it's free to not exercise."
- Bridger Winegar
"I am dying with the help of too many physicians." — Unknown
"My idea of exercise is a good brisk sit."
- Phyllis Dille
"Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint." —Mark Twain
"The best abs exercise is five sets of stop eating so much..."
– Lazar Angelov
"The only time to eat diet food is while you're waiting for the steak to cook"- Julia Child
