“The only clubs I’m interested in are sandwiches.”
― Unknown
“The only thing I like better than talking about food is eating.”
— John Walters
“A party without a cake is really just a meeting.”
― Julia Child
“I’m like Pacman when I’m at a party, I eat everything and run away from anyone coming close to me.”
― Unknown
“There’s no “we” in ice cream.”
― Unknown
"Life expectancy would grow by leaps and bounds if green vegetables smelled as good as bacon."
— Doug Larson
“Nutrition labels should include a “What if I ate the whole thing” section.”
― Unknown
“If we’re not meant to have midnight snacks, why is there a light in the fridge?”
― Unknown
"A fruit is a vegetable with looks and money. Plus, if you let fruit rot, it turns into wine, something Brussels sprouts never do."
– P. J. O’Rourke
"The 12-step chocoholics program: Never be more than 12 steps away from chocolate!"
— Terry Moore
"A slice of pie without cheese is like a kiss without a squeeze."
— Stephen King
"A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand."
— Barbara Johnson
“I thought about losing weight once, but I don’t like losing.”
― Unknown
“Every day is National Donut Day if you put your mind to it.”
― Unknown
"I lost some weight once, but I found it again in the fridge."
— Unknown
"Life is uncertain. Eat dessert first."
– Ernestine Ulmer
"Watermelon - it's a good fruit. You eat, you drink, you wash your face."
— Enrico Caruso
“Some people can eat anything they want and stay slim. I put on weight just by reading the recipe.”
― Unknown
“All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt.”
― Charles M. Schulz
“Those pizzas I ate were for medicinal purposes.”
― Amy Neftzger
"When the waitress asked if I wanted my pizza cut into four or eight slices, I said, 'Four. I don't think I can eat eight."
— Yogi Berra
"An onion can make people cry but there's never been a vegetable that can make people laugh."
— Will Rogers
“Being a beaver is nice, if you’re hungry you just eat a piece of your home.”
― Unknown
“Every pizza is a personal pizza if you try hard and believe in yourself.”
― Bill Murray
"I'll have a double cappuccino, half-caf, non-fat milk, with enough foam to be aesthetically pleasing, but not so much that it would leave a mustache."
— Niles Crane
"My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four. Unless there are three other people."
— Orson Welles
“Little known fact, gentlemen. Tacos are the food of genius.”
― Heather Brewer
“Pizza is like the entire food pyramid!”
― Madeline Oles
“I want to tell you about the "sausage principle." The theory says, "If you love something, never try to find out how it is done."”
― Unknown
"Humor keeps us alive. Humor and food. Don't forget food. You can go a week without laughing."
— Joss Whedon
“Love and sausage are alike. Can never have enough of either.”
— Trixie Koontz
"After a good dinner, one can forgive anybody, even one's own relations."
— Oscar Wilde
“You only live once… Lick the bowl!”
― Unknown
"The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for thirty years she served the family nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found."
— Calvin Trillin
"All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt."
— Charles M. Shulz
“Your body is not a temple, it’s an amusement park. Enjoy the ride.”
― Anthony Bourdain
“Love means never having to say “Should we get dessert?”
― Unknown
"I was a vegetarian until I started leaning toward the sunlight."
– Rita Rudner
“A pizza slice a day keeps sadness away.”
― Jet Paacal
"Fish is the only food that is considered spoiled once it smells like what it is."
— P. J. O'Rourke
"When we put vegetables up for the winter, we use jars, but we call it canning. I find that jarring. And uncanny."
– Greg Tamblyn
"I don't eat lobsters, shrimp, or crawfish because I don't eat anything that looks like I should step on it."
— George Carlin
"I'm not sure what makes pepperoni so good if it's the pepper or the oni."
— Ulrik Stephens
"We must have a pie. Stress cannot exist in the presence of a pie."
– David Mamet
“Swiss cheese differs from Camembert by better ventilation.”
― Unknown
"I would like to find a stew that will give me heartburn immediately, instead of at three o'clock in the morning."
– John Barrymore
"The only time to eat diet food is while you're waiting for the steak to cook."
— Julia Child
"If we shake out all of the crumbs from all of the keyboards in the world, we can end world hunger."
— Matthew Dolkart
"As a child, my family's menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it."
— Buddy Hackett
"Life is too short for self-hatred and celery sticks."
– Marilyn Wann