Why did the spy cross the road?
Because he was never on your side.
A Duck is about to cross the road. A chicken runs out to stop him screaming "Don't do it, man - you'll never hear the end of it!"
Why is everyone mad when the pig crosses the road?
Because he’s a road hog.
Why did the cat cross the road?
Because her owner told her not to do it.
Why did the lion cross the road?
He was bored of lion around.
Why did the horse cross the road?
To get to the apple store.
How many birds can cross the road?
Toucan.
Why did the goldfish cross the road?
Because the chicken was on holiday.
Why did the snail take so long to cross the road?
It was feeling sluggish.
Why did the fish cross the road?
To get to its school.
What did the buffalo say when his son crossed the road?
-Bison.
Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road?
Because he didn’t have the guts.
Why did the farmer cross the road?
To get his chicken back.
Why does the tin keep crossing the road?
Because it can.
Why did the clock cross the road?
It couldn’t wait.
Why did Adele cross the road?
To say hello from the other side!
Which bug always crosses the road?
A beetle.
Why did the duck cross the road?
Because it thought it was a chicken.
Why did Hans cross the road alone?
Hans wanted to travel solo.
Why did the alphabet cross the road?
To get from Point A to Point B.
Why did the toddler cross the road?
He wanted to pet the chicken.
What kind of cat always crosses the road?
A jaguar.
Why did the clown cross the road?
To retrieve his rubber chicken.
Why did the nose cross the road?
Because he was tired of getting picked on.
Why did the czar cross the road?
To get to his car.
Why did the cow cross the road?
So he could go to the MOO-vies.
Why did the pillow cross the road?
It was picking up the chicken’s feathers.
Why did the bunny cross the road?
To go to the hare dresser.
How long did it take Lancelot to cross the road?
All knight.
Why did the rooster cross the road?
He had something to cock-a-doodle dooo!
Why did the monkey cross the road?
Because the chicken retired.
Why did the horse dance while crossing the road?
He was horsing around.
Why did the doctor cross the road?
Hard to say really. Could be any number of reasons.
Why did the toilet paper cross the road?
It was stuck to the chicken’s foot.
Why did the coyote cross the road?
It was chasing the road runner.
Why did the dog cross the road?
Because he was chasing the chicken.
Why did the Communist wait till the last minute to cross the road?
He was Stalin.
Why did my wife cross the road?
To go back to the same shoe shop we went to three hours ago.
How did the sushi cross the road?
It was rolling.
Why did the fox cross the road?
She was chasing the chicken.
Why did the turtle cross the road?
To get to the Shell station.
Why did the fish cross the ocean?
To get to the other tide.
Why did the wolf take so long to cross the road?
It was pretending to be a snail.
Why couldn't the mathematician cross the road?
Because he kept trying to half the distance.
Why didn’t the bicycle cross the road?
Because it was two tired!
Why did the dragon cross the road?
He was dragged on by his mum.
Why did the sheep cross the road?
To get to the baa-baa shop for a haircut.
Why didn’t the flamingo cross the road?
Because he’s not a chicken.
Why did the corn cross the road?
Because it was being stalked.
Why did the gum cross the road?
It was stuck to the chicken’s foot.
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