It was so cold that we pulled everything out of the freezer and huddled inside to keep warm.
It’s so cold I left Starbuck with mocha lattes and by the time I got to the car I had fudgicles.
It's so cold that Starbucks started serving coffee on a stick.
It’s so cold that even the ATM shows minus.
It’s so cold the school nurse has to use a steamer to remove the instruments from the lips of the brass band members after the concert.
It’s so cold every kind of cereal in the cupboard is frosted – including the boxes!
It’s so cold my mail shattered when I tried to open it.
It’s so cold the rats in the alley were bribing the cats for a snuggle.
It's so cold that trees are chopping themselves into firewood.
It’s so cold I had to eat ice cream just to warm up.
It's so cold that the optician was giving away free ice scrapers with every new pair of eyeglasses.
It’s so cold my hat wrapped itself in a scarf.
It’s so cold my shadow ended up freezing on the sidewalk.
It’s so cold that even the snowmen are wearing sweaters!
It was so cold that I saw a Greyhound bus and the dog was riding on the inside.
It’s so cold that bed bugs promised not to bite you as long as they can snuggle in your pajamas.
It’s so cold a glacier was seen heading slowly down the main street of our town.
It's so cold that our words froze in midair — we had to put them in a frying pan to thaw them so we could hear what we were talking about.
It’s so cold we had to punch a hole in the air just to get outside.
It’s so cold the police told a robber to freeze, and he really did.
It’s so cold we have to carry around hammers and chisels so we could get out of our clothes!
It’s so cold sheep were demanding their wool back.
It's so cold that polar bears wear jackets.
It’s so cold we didn’t clean the house, we just defrosted it.
It’s so cold that when I needed an anesthetic, the dentist told me to stick my head out the hospital window.
It’s so cold my money turned into cold, hard cash.
It’s so cold ice cubes are coming out of my tap.
It's so cold that you might have to chop up the piano for firewood (although you’ll only get two chords).
It’s so cold we were afraid to spit because it can ricochet.
It’s so cold that I’m breathing out snowflakes!
It’s so cold that when we baked the frozen pizza in the oven for 25 minutes, it was still frozen.
It’s so cold I saw Superman taking a taxi.
It’s so cold the anticipation of waiting for my ketchup to come out of the bottle lasted three months.
It's so cold that you have to break the smoke off your chimney.
It's so cold that people look forward to getting a fever.
It’s so cold that Grandpa’s teeth are chattering – in the glass!
It's so cold that I’m drinking hot sauce instead of coffee.
It’s so cold I saw an Amish guy buying an electric blanket.
It’s so cold the local graveyard put heaters out for the ghosts.
It's so cold that you have to open the fridge to heat the house.
It’s so cold the cosmetics counter at the local department store started selling cream for goosebumps.
It’s so cold we had to stop eating with metal cutlery. Some people walked around for days with spoons or forks stuck to their tongues!
It's so cold that the rock rattling around in your shoe is your toe.
It was so cold firemen couldn’t get the people out of the burning building because it was warm.
It’s so cold we had to salt the hallway.
It’s so cold washroom attendants have started putting salt boxes next to the toilets.
It’s so cold we had to chisel the dog off a lamp post.
It’s so cold I actually enjoyed someone spilling hot coffee in my lap.
It's so cold that the band changed their name to Red Cold Chili Peppers.
It’s so cold I swapped my pillow for a grill.
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