“There should be a rule against people trying to be funny before the sun comes up.”
– Kristen Chandler
"Early morning cheerfulness can be extremely obnoxious."
— William Feather
"When I woke up this morning my girlfriend asked me, “Did you sleep good?” I said, “No, I made a few mistakes.”
– Steven Wright
"When reality and dreams collide, typically it’s just your alarm clock going off.”
— Crystal Woods
“So far as I know, anything worth hearing is not usually uttered at seven o’clock in the morning; and if it is, it will generally be repeated at a more reasonable hour for a larger and more wakeful audience.”
— Moss Hart
“When late morning rolls around and you’re feeling a bit out of sorts, don’t worry; you’re probably just a little eleven o’clockish.”
– Unknown
“Never face facts; if you do you’ll never get up in the morning.”
— Marlo Thomas
“Twinkle twinkle sleepy star, wake up now it’s the 11th hour, up above the world so high, the sun has risen in the sky.”
– Mickey Nice
“Progress isn’t made by early risers. It’s made by lazy men trying to find easier ways to do something."
— Robert Heinlein
"I arise in the morning torn between a desire to improve the world and a desire to enjoy the world."
— E. B. White
“Moist groaned. It was the crack of seven and he was allergic to the concept of two seven o’clocks in one day.”
— Terry Pratchett
"I can rise and shine, just not at the same time."
– Unknown
"My routine is to ride that snooze button as far as it will take me, take a quick shower, get dressed in the dark and bolt out the door."
— Willie Geist
"The easiest time to fall asleep is just after turning off the alarm clock."
– Unknown
“Good morning is a contradiction of terms.”
— Jim Davis
“Do you wish me a good morning, or mean that it is a good morning whether I want it or not; or that you feel good this morning; or that it is a morning to be good on?”
— J.R.R. Tolkien
"The best part of waking up is still a mystery to me."
— Uknown
"Even bad coffee is better than no coffee at all." — David Lynch
"Today’s goals: Coffee and kindness. Maybe two coffees and then kindness."
— Nanea Hoffman
“Luckily, today has been canceled. Go back to bed.”
– Unknown
“Morning will come, it has no choice.”
— Marty Rubin
"I orchestrate my mornings to the tune of coffee."
– Terri Guillemets
"It sounds plausible enough tonight, but wait until tomorrow. Wait for the common sense of the morning."
— H.G. Wells
"I hate mornings, they start so early."
— Janet Evanovich
“I smiled right after getting up. I think I dislocated my face. Good Morning!”
– Unknown
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