“Why is Monday so far from Friday? And why is Friday so close to Monday?”
“Hello and welcome to Monday. Do you take sugar, cream, or Valium in your morning coffee?”
“Is it Monday already? I’m almost positive I did not get my entire portion of the weekend.”
“Take a deep breath and try to relax. I promise – Monday will be over soon.”
“Monday: One of those days when even when your coffee needs a coffee.”
“Monday, you're so jealous of my relationship with Sunday because I am so happy to see you leave!”
“I have decided to cast my vote for any political candidate whose platform adds Monday to the weekend.”
“Maybe Monday doesn’t like you either.”
“Monday is almost Tuesday, which is not so far from Wednesday which is neighboring Thursday, and Friday. Enjoy your day!”
“I hate mornings and Mondays. And working. But other than that I am entirely happy.”
“SMONDAY: The moment when Sunday stops feeling like a Sunday and the anxiety of Monday kicks in.”
“We interrupt your happiness to bring you Mondays. Don’t worry, you’re regularly scheduled happiness will resume again on Friday.”
“When life gives you Monday, dip it in glitter and sparkle all day.”
“So. Monday. We meet again. We will never be friends—but maybe we can move past our mutual enmity toward a more-positive partnership.”
— Julio Alexi Genao
“Keep calm and pretend it’s not Monday.”
“So. Monday. We meet again. We will never be friends — but maybe we can move past our mutual enmity toward a more positive partnership.”
“Someone should enact a holiday that honors all people who turn up for work on Mondays.”
“Never make your favorite song the alarm for Monday morning; you’ll hate it for years.”
“Good morning. Keep calm and pretend it’s not Monday.”
“This has been such a Monday! I wish I stayed in bed, and I wish that yesterday had never happened.”
– Lisa Mantchev
“If Monday was a gift, I would happily return it to the person who gave it to me.”
“Due to lack of interest. Monday has been canceled.”
“I'm always in a bad mood on Monday morning. It makes me hate everything for no reason whatsoever.”
“I don’t like Sunday nights because you have to wake up to a Monday morning.”
“You are in control. Never allow your Monday to be manic.”
— Andrea L’Artiste
“If Monday were a person, it would be a boring friend who always forces us to do what we don’t want.”
“If I was elected president, the first thing I would do would be to eliminate all Mondays and lengthen the weekend one more day.”
“This is the mondayest Monday that ever mondayed.”
“Sunday morning my head is bad. But it's worth all the time I had. But I've got to go and get some rest. For Monday is a mess!”
– Dave Bartholomew, Blue Monday
“I really need a day in-between Sunday and Monday.”
“Dear Monday, I want to break up. I’m seeing Tuesday and dreaming about Friday. Sincerely, it’s not me, it’s you.”
“Roses are red, Mondays are hard. I’m not good at poetry. COFFEE.”
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