"People that insist upon drinking and driving, are putting the quart before the hearse."
– Gilbert K. Chesterton
“A tourist is a fellow who drives thousands of miles so he can be photographed standing in front of his car.”
– Emile Ganest
“Kilometers are shorter than miles. Save gas, take your next trip in kilometers.”
– George Carlin
“Any man who can drive safely while kissing a pretty girl is simply not giving the kiss the attention it deserves.”
— Albert Einstein
“Yes officer I did see the speed limit sign, I just didn’t see you.”
“Nascar would be so much more entertaining if they threw banana peels and turtle shells.”
“I couldn’t repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.”
– Steven Wright
“Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?”
– George Carlin
“How did my driving test go? You could say I mailed it!”
“I love road trips. You get into this Zen rhythm; throw the sense of time out the window.”
– Miriam Toews
"Drive slow and enjoy the scenery - drive fast and join the scenery."
- Douglas Horton
“Driving at night is about communicating with lights.”
— Lukhman Pambra
“I had to stop driving my car for a while… the tires got dizzy.”
— Stephen Wright
"I don't run a car, have never run a car. I could say that this is because I have this extremely tender environmentalist conscience, but the fact is I hate driving."
- David Attenborough
“That’s why I love road trips, dude. It’s like doing something without actually doing anything.”
– John Green
“Aerodynamics are for people who can’t build engines.”
– Enzo Ferrari
“The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status, or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we all believe that we are above-average drivers.”
– Dave Barry
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