Chuck Norris breathes air … five times a day.
Chuck Norris once climbed Mt. Everest in 15 minutes, 14 of which he was building a snowman at the bottom.
Chuck Norris caught COVID.
But then he felt bad, so he let it go.
Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did.
This morning Chuck Norris was shot.
Check the news, The bullet is in critical condition
Chuck Norris beat the sun in a staring contest.
Have you heard that Chuck Norris has started building non-sqaure homes?
He's on a round house kick.
Chuck Norris knows Victoria's secret.
Chuck Norris once went to mars. Thats why there are no signs of life.
When Chuck Norris moved out, his dad became the man of the house.
When Chuck Norris does division, there are no remainders.
Chuck Norris is the only person on the planet that can kick you in the back of the face.
Chuck Norris doesn't cheat death. He wins fair and square.
The flu gets a Chuck Norris shot every year.
Chuck Norris had to stop washing his clothes in the ocean. Too many tsunamis.
Chuck Norris can sneeze with his eyes open.
Chuck Norris doesn't play "hide-and-seek." He plays "hide-and-pray-I-don't-find-you."
Chuck Norris can stand at the bottom of a bottomless pit.
Chuck Norris once went skydiving, but promised never to do it again. One Grand Canyon is enough.
If Chuck Norris were to travel to an alternate dimension in which there was another Chuck Norris and they both fought, they would both win.
Chuck Norris can drown a fish.
Chuck Norris once round-house kicked a salesman. Over the phone.
Chuck Norris has a mug of nails instead of coffee in the morning.
Chuck Norris can clap with one hand.
When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he’s pushing the Earth down.
Chuck Norris plays russian roulette with a fully loded revolver... and wins.
Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
Chuck Norris caught Covid-19 yesterday
The virus is quarantined for two weeks
Chuck Norris once trew a party.
It still hasn't landed.
Chuck Norris just put up a new sign outside his house...
It says 'Welcome, Spanish Inquisition!'
Chuck Norris never retreats; He just attacks in the opposite direction.
Outer space exists because it’s afraid to be on the same planet as Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris was once on Celebrity Wheel of Fortune and was the first to spin. The next 29 minutes of the show consisted of everyone standing around awkwardly, waiting for the wheel to stop.
Chuck Norris can strangle you with a cordless phone.
Chuck Norris once shot an enemy plane down with his finger, by yelling, “Bang!”
Ghosts are actually caused by Chuck Norris killing people faster than Death can process them.
Brett Favre can throw a football over 50 yards. Chuck Norris can throw Brett Favre even further.
Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
Some kids pee their name in the snow. Chuck Norris can pee his name in dry concrete.
In the Beginning there was nothing … then Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked nothing and told it to get a job.
Chuck Norris sleeps with a pillow under his gun.
We live in an expanding universe. All of it is trying to get away from Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris once bowled a perfect game with a marble.
Chuck Norris doesn't pet any animals. Animals pet themselves when he approaches them.
Chuck Norris once threw a grenade and killed 50 people
Then the grenade exploded.
Chuck Norris looked directly at the sun today...
And the sun got so scared it hid behind the moon.
When Chuck Norris was born he drove his mom home from the hospital.
The quickest way to a man’s heart is with Chuck Norris’s fist.
Chuck Norris knows the last digit of Pi.
Chuck Norris's Blood Type is AK-47.
Go to BabaMail
