"The only b.s I need is bikini and sandals"
"Summer- the time when parents realize how underpaid teachers actually are"
“If you saw a heat wave, would you wave back?"
– Steven Wright
"I can't wait to start blaming my normal lack of productivity on it being summer"
“Sunshine and happiness go together like fish and chips!”
― Catherine Pulsifer
"I need summer to be longer so I have more time to do nothing"
“Let a man walk ten miles steadily on a hot summer’s day along a dusty English road, and he will soon discover why beer was invented.”
- Gilbert K. Chesterton
“Spring is when you feel like whistling, even with a shoe full of slush.”
– Doug Larson
“Heat, ma'am! It was so dreadful here that I found there was nothing left for it but to take off my flesh and sit in my bones.”
- Sydney Smith
"Taking a dog named Shark to the beach is a bad idea"
“The most obnoxious thing in the world is to listen to others drone on about how much they love the heat.”
“The coldest winter I ever spent was a summer in San Francisco.
– Mark Twain
“Summer vacation: where you drink triple, see double and act single.”
-
"I like swimming in a sun shirt. People always look at me like I fell in the pool"
– Jim Gaffigan
“During summer vacation, you get to do all your favorite things; cook hot dogs over a campfire (while being eaten alive by mosquitoes).”
– Bruce Lansky
Summer should get a speeding ticket
"Pollen- when flowers can't keep it in their plants"
“Vacation is that time when you wish you had something to do while doing nothing.”
–Frank Tyger