There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.
Chuck Norris once went to mars. Thats why there are no signs of life.
What was going through the minds of all of Chuck Norris' victims before they died?
His Shoe.
Chuck Norris used to beat up his shadow because it was following too close. It now stands 15 feet behind him.
Chuck Norris once ordered a steak in a restaurant. The steak did what it was told.
Chuck Norris invented airplanes because he was tired of being the only person that could fly.
Big foot claims he saw Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris does not use spell check. If he happens to misspell a word, Oxford will change the spelling.
Chuck Norris doesn't play "hide-and-seek." He plays "hide-and-pray-I-don't-find-you."
If you spell Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win. Forever.
When Bruce Banner gets mad he turns into the Hulk. When the Hulk gets mad he turns into Chuck Norris. When Chuck Norris gets mad, run.
Chuck Norris just put up a new sign outside his house...
It says 'Welcome, Spanish Inquisition!'
The dinosaurs looked at Chuck Norris the wrong way once. Once.
Chuck Norris can sneeze with his eyes open.
Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
When Chuck Norris's daughter lost her virginity... he got it back.
When Chuck Norris smokes a joint
the weed gets high of Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris caught COVID.
But then he felt bad, so he let it go.
Chuck refers to himself in the fourth person.
Chuck Norris was bitten by the worlds most venemous snake.
After hours of excruciating pain and misery, the snake died.
Chuck Norris has a gun for breakfast at ate a glock every morning.
Chuck Norris has died.
He has since recovered from this mild inconvenience.
Chuck Norris' email address:
Gmail@chucknorris.com
Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
Chuck Norris once heard that nothing can kill him
So he tracked down nothing and killed it.