Took the family on a whitewater rafting trip, and first time we came to a sudden descent in the river, we lost everything...
That was just one of the downfalls!
Did you hear about the soldier who got struck by lightning?
He had to be honorably discharged.
Nowadays, people drought the accuracy of weather men because the climatic patterns are so unpredictable.
What do you call a benzene ring where the iron atoms replacing all of the carbon atoms? A ferrous wheel.
Why did the sapling jump in the ocean? He wanted to swim with the manatrees.
Where’s the best beach to buy sports gear at?
Jersey Shore.
The main difference between the weather and a horse is that one rains down while the other is reined up.
Why did the woman go outdoors with her purse open?
Because she expected some change in the weather.
Sorry for raining on your parade, I really thought it'd be snow problem.
Have a gneiss day! This is one of the simplest rock puns, but it is certainly a gneiss way to start your day out right!
Why aren’t trees competitive sports fans? They like to root for everyone.
The Azteca Stadium in Mexico has been so neglectfully maintained that there are foot-long grasses on the pitch. Now we call it the Grass-teca Stadium.
There are two reasons why you should never drink toilet water.
Number one. And number two.
What do plants and homies have in common?
I love watching them grow.
It's ok to be negative if you find yourself in a thunderstorm.
You probably won't get struck by lightning.
When the rainbow decided to speak out at the meeting of all weathers, someone said 'Look hue's talking.'
Why don’t trees travel in groups? Because two’s a company, but tree’s a crowd.
What did one snowman say to the other snowman?
Do you smell carrots?
Why did the boy keep his trumpet in the freezer?
Because he liked cool music.
I was surprised when I saw a man get struck by lightning.
The man was shocked as well.
Q: What did the cloud say to the lightning bolt?
A: You're shocking!
The bartender asks one of The Beach Boys what they’d like, so he looks back to his friends
“Get a round?” “Round?” “Round?” “I’ll get a round!”
I know a man whose last name is Storm
He has three daughters: Summer, April, and Haley.
Why are there fish at the bottom of the sea?
Because they dropped out of school.
What do you call it when a panda eats all of your tall grass?
Bamboozled!
What’s a cetacean’s favorite TV show?
Whale of Fortune.
How do you split the ocean in half?
With a sea-saw.
Australia announced that they have begun dumping sewage into the ocean
It’s now classified as an in-continent.
The storm was sad so we called it the sigh-clone.
What did Abel yell to his brother when he noticed a storm coming?
Hurry, Cain!!
What did the tree say when it fell down?
"Call pine one one!"
My brother once froze a dollar in a block of ice
It was cold hard cash.
What is bigger than a Christmas tree?
A Christmas four
I've always considered mountain plateaus to be the highest forms of flattery.
What did the snowman eat?
Icebergs with chilli sauce.
I was trying to look at a picture of the ocean but kept having to reload the page, it finally worked after 5 attempts.
That was refreshing to sea.
My neighbour always thinks he knows more about the weather than me
The guy is a real snow it all.
What side of the tree contains the most leaves? The outside, of course.
Q: What do you call a gust of wind that blows a tall guys onto a basketball court?
A: The NBA draft
Why was the pine tree always in trouble? It kept being knotty.
What’s a flower’s favorite band?
Guns n’ Roses.
What did the boy volcano say to the girl volcano?
I really lava you!
Why were the herbs not fully grown yet? They didn't have enough thyme!
My wife drives like lightning.
I don't mean she drives fast - she hits trees.
When a mountain falls sick, it tells the doctor that he's feeling really very, very hill.
Q: What is a cloud's favorite reptile?
A: A blizzard.
When it comes to getting things done, my work ethic is like lightning.
I take the path of least resistance.
What happens when you blend sulfur, tungsten and silver together? SWAG.
Why is the mushroom always invited to parties? Because he's a fun-gi.
Why can’t minerals ever lie? They’re always in their pure form.
Where do naughty rainbows go?
Prism