Pink is the early bird of the rainbow colors, it's always the first to rose and shine.
Why did the flower take her husband back after he cheated?
She rose above it.
Why didn’t Guns N Roses turn up for the gig when it was snowing?
Axel Froze.
I'm reading a book called "The Yellow River"
It's written by I.P. Freely
The weatherman said it might get a bit drizzly outside.
You can expect a Lil’ Wayne.
I got camping insurance....but if someone steals my tent in the middle of the night....
I'm no longer covered.
I went to the shooting range for the first time, but I couldn’t get my gun to fire
I had to read the trouble shooting section in the manual
What did the water plant worker say when their facility flooded?
Dam.
Did you hear about the ocean and sea having a baby?
It was a buoy!
Are you squiding me right now?
Why don’t elephants go to the beach?
Because their trunks always fall down.
Why is the ocean so salty?
Because the land never waves back.
Are you addicted to the ocean and ocean life?
If you are, sea kelp
What do you call a gangsta snowman?
Froze-T.
My boss told me that he was going to fire the person with the worst posture
I have a hunch, it might be me.
What does a flower therapist ask her patients?
Are you feeling bouquet?
It's really easy to learn white water kayaking
You just go with the flow.
Be careful out there during the snowstorm. It ain't snow joke.
You should dress up warm in the Andes. That place is Chile.
My glasses fogged up once I came out of the AC room last summer, but I was okay because I was opti-mistic.
What is the king’s favorite type of precipitation?
Hail, of course!
Q: Why does a hurricane wear a monocle?
A: It has only had one eye!
RIP boiled water.
You will be mist.
What do you call a can of pop found in a conglomerate?
Coca-Cola Clastic.
What do pines eat for breakfast? Past-trees.
I've always considered mountain plateaus to be the highest forms of flattery.
How heavy is a rainbow? It's actually pretty light.
Ensure you save for the rainy day because even your closest friends can give you a cold shoulder.
The forager was in such mixed moods this morning and we guessed he picked and ate the wrong class of mushrooms.
What did they use to set off the amazon warehouse fire?
Amazon kindle.
What happens when it rains cats and dogs? You have to be careful not to step in a poodle!
What is an evil dictator’s favorite type of weather?
A rain of terror.
What time is it when little white flakes fall past the classroom window?
Snow and Tell.
When we were young, we had this myth that lightning bolts go all the way to cloud 9.
What’s a cetacean’s favorite TV show?
Whale of Fortune.
It's been a while since I heard jokes about people sitting on wet morning grass.
They're over dew.
My glasses may be fogged up, but don’t worry I’ll be fine.
I’m optimistic!
Rainbows are very uncommon, they are blue and far between.
What happens if someone chucks a rock at you? You hit the rock’s bottom.
What did the flower do when she was challenged?
Rose to the occasion.
Why did the fisherman start doing drugs?
Pier pressure.
How did the pines and firs end their war? With a tree-ty.
Q: What do you call a gust of wind that blows a tall guys onto a basketball court?
A: The NBA draft
I told my friend a tree pun.
He was stumped.
What do you get when you cross a rabbit with a water hose?
Hare spray.
It was a great fire. It was a bon-fire.
How do you get into the mush-room? Ring the porta-bella.
Did you hear about the big company that made syrup from contaminated trees? They maple their syrup from the shelves.
Why did the sapling go to the doctor’s office? He was feeling a little green.
Why do freshwater fish cry so much?
They’re just a stream of emotions.